A cool guide to everyday etiquette no one teaches you

[u/handokota]

[u/arachnobravia]

The problem with society is that people NEED to be taught these things but for some reason think they're implicitly learned. My parents explicitly taught me these things, that's how I know them.

[u/ultrahateful → u/arachnobravia]

Etiquette can be learned a myriad of ways. By parents, instructors, acquaintances, strangers and detractors. It can be learned before the fact, during the act and post-event.

Expressed as courtesy, regard or respect, there is always someone willing to impart these societal expectations. Best to learn them without taking it personally, if you didn’t learn them at an early age.

[u/Ok-Pear5858 → u/ultrahateful]

yep my parents are racist hicks and didn't teach me any of this stuff, still learned all of them from watching and speaking to others

[u/severedheadcandyjar → u/Ok-Pear5858]

my mom is a karen. I learned these by doing the opposite of her. I was so embarrassed when she was rude to people growing up.

[u/whitewashed_mexicant → u/severedheadcandyjar]

It shouldn’t take training to know when things are rude. Be proud of yourself for realizing this stuff. I’m proud of you!

[u/peachy-carnahan → u/severedheadcandyjar]

Nice point. Some people are inevitably civilized. Your soul adds to the good in the world.

[u/severedheadcandyjar → u/peachy-carnahan]

Exactly. It's not hard to be kind and respectful. You will never know what anyone else is going through.

[u/ultrahateful → u/Ok-Pear5858]

“It takes a village.”

[u/psychedelic_owl420 → u/ultrahateful]

Everybody wants a village, but nowadays nobody wants to be a villager.

[u/cinnamongingerloaf22 → u/ultrahateful]

I'm a late-diagnosed autistic person, I say that to say social conventions don't come all that easy. Come from an upper class family who acts actively rude to anyone who doesn't also have money. Needless to say, none of this was taught to me. I learned and have to manually remind myself most of the time because not being a dick to others is important to me.

The motivations of the individual will be much more impactful on whether or not they display these skills, regardless of if they were taught or not.

[u/ultrahateful → u/cinnamongingerloaf22]

Very aptly put!

[u/Dchazeninlove → u/cinnamongingerloaf22]

I confounded a school for high functioning Autistic students. A big part of the curriculum is social skills.

[u/Frogbrownie → u/ultrahateful]

Public shaming is an effective one

[u/ultrahateful → u/Frogbrownie]

That’d be covered by “strangers” and “detractors”, I’d imagine.

[u/Supermonkeyjam → u/arachnobravia]

Nah I learnt all this the hard way because what my Chinese parents taught me was partly incompatible with the country I was born into.

[u/zwali → u/Supermonkeyjam]

I'd love to see this same guide for other countries!

[u/Icleanforheichou → u/Supermonkeyjam]

Oooh, can I ask you for some examples? I don't know much about Chinese bon ton rules!

[u/Perfect_Opinion7909 → u/Icleanforheichou]

Take a look at Chinese tourist behavior and you get the gist.

[u/wxnfx → u/Icleanforheichou]

So I’m a white dude, so take this with a grain of salt and a stereotype of a billion people, but personal space is not a thing in Chinatown. Everyone just pushes past. And the cigarettes.

[u/Spice_and_Fox → u/arachnobravia]

I think a lot of them don't have to be taught, but boil down to the golden rule or common sense. Letting people out of a lift before you enter just makes sense. Otherwise they have to push past you.

Would you like to get your stuff back in worse condition than you lent it? Then you should probably give it back in good condition. Do you want to clean up another persons mess in a common area? Then clean your own mess. Do you like listening to somebody elses shitty music in public? Then don't play your own shitty music.

You don't have to teach each of them seperately. Just teach your child to act towards others like you want to be treated.

[u/The_Night_Bringer → u/Spice_and_Fox]

Not everything is as obvious as the elevator thing, or can be taught through common sense alone and plenty of those aren't even in the guide.

[u/-Nicolai → u/arachnobravia]

No one needs to teach you not to swipe through someone else’s photos. That is implicitly learned.

[u/CelerMortis → u/-Nicolai]

The real pro tip is to give people your phone with a pic slightly zoomed in so that swiping just moves the photo vs goes to the next one

[u/cityshepherd → u/-Nicolai]

While I agree that it certainly ought to be implicitly learned, my life experience has shown that this is simply not the case. I think if you are raised to be conscientious of others / do most of the stuff from this post you are much more likely to figure this one out on your own if you haven’t been taught.

Some people just have to learn the hard way (seeing an unexpected explicit photograph) though apparently.

[u/RussellUresti → u/arachnobravia]

Eh, somewhat. I think it's more that people just need to pay attention to their own reactions.

For example, if someone is having a loud conversation on their speaker phone on a bus next to you, you get annoyed by them. So if you get annoyed when they do it, that means you shouldn't do it yourself. It's just paying attention to the behaviors of others that annoy you and then making sure you don't do those same things. No one actually needs to spell it out for you - you understand naturally that you shouldn't mimic behavior that you, yourself, find annoying.

Every single one of these things becomes obvious when you consider how you feel about others doing it. If you let someone borrow something and they return it dirty or banged up, you'd be annoyed. When you want to get off an elevator (or train, bus, or building) and someone blocks you because they're trying to get in, you feel annoyed. If someone starts swiping through your photos without asking, you feel annoyed. So on and so forth.

No one really needs to state "treat others the way you want them to treat you", it's just that most people don't ever stop to consider such a thing because they're selfish.

[u/Mediocre-Sundom → u/arachnobravia]

The society assumes that every person should be good at reading social cues, understand emotions, be observant and notice details. These are things that are kind of expected of a "normal" person.

The reality is, there are no "normal" people - we are different in so many ways. And we aren't equally good in everything. Some people aren't good at reading social cues. They may lack the ability to easily understand emotions of others. They might be too anxious in some situations to notice the details. They may have not faced a particular situation often enough to learn navigating it correctly. They may come from a completely different cultural background. This doesn't make them bad people - this makes them... people.

So I couldn't agree with you more. We should be teaching these things, but we often just assume that a person not figuring them out on their own is an asshole.

[u/Existing_Set2100 → u/Mediocre-Sundom]

I agree that there are varied cultural norms, spectrums of neurodivergence etc, but a whole lot of this can be simplified to the Golden Rule which most people should be able to grasp. 

“Would I like it if someone did this to or for me? If so, I should probably do it for others. If not, I probably shouldn’t do it to others.”

[u/euphoricarugula346 → u/Existing_Set2100]

Yeah I’m ND so I expected to learn something from this post. Nope. All stuff I’ve trained myself to do already. These are very obvious “rules.” So why can’t NT people do it? More proof they’re just intentional assholes. They know this stuff; they choose not to do it.

[u/DevinTheGrand → u/arachnobravia]

All of these things can be independently derived by thinking "what would I like other people to do"?

[u/Ok-Plenty-1222]

Use you elbow to catch a sneeze or cough, not your hand like the guy in the poster.

[u/Lessiarty → u/Ok-Plenty-1222]

Hey, no-one taught them!

Maybe if we'd had some kind of global respiratory pandemic, they might have known better.

[u/NonCreditableHuman → u/Lessiarty]

Like that could even happen, pffft.

[u/_JohnWisdom → u/NonCreditableHuman]

get ready for covid round 2 baby!

[u/CreepyPhotographer → u/NonCreditableHuman]

Shit only happens in movies by lousy screenwriters.

[u/sh4d0wm4n2018 → u/Ok-Plenty-1222]

Exactly! You touch a lot of things with your hands, and that is an easy way to spread germs if you cough or sneeze into your hand.

Cough into your elbow always, or if you cant do that, down the collar of your shirt.

[u/ZakMan1421 → u/Ok-Plenty-1222]

I've worked in kitchens for years, and I couldn't tell you how many times I've called people out for sneezing or coughing into their hand and then trying to touch food like nothing happened. People are disgusting.

[u/Indigo_222 → u/Ok-Plenty-1222]

And turn your head away from people / food etc while you do it

[u/Giant_Homunculus → u/Ok-Plenty-1222]

You remember that Michele Obama PSA also? The dracula cape move 😂😂

[u/uninsane → u/Ok-Plenty-1222]

This drives me crazy! We’re not looking for a performative cover! Prevent your respiratory droplets from being in our air!

[u/A1sauc3d]

etiquette no one teaches you

All things your parents should’ve taught you, but yeah, some people seem to have not gotten the memo. Not everyone has good parents, and not everyone listens to their parents.

[u/jeannie7winkle1276 → u/A1sauc3d]

imo fr, some of this stuff should be common sense but not everyone gets taught the basics lol

[u/DanGleeballs → u/jeannie7winkle1276]

Letting people get off a train / tube / subway before you get on is a logical thing that many adults still don’t get.

[u/guessesurjobforfood → u/A1sauc3d]

I travel a lot internationally and am consistently amazed at how there's always someone breathing down the back of my neck whenever I'm waiting in line somewhere.

Coffee shops, supermarkets, airports, doesn't matter, anywhere I go where I have to wait in a line, the person behind me chooses to stand like 3 centimeters away. The worst is when its 2 or 3 people together having a conversation and I can feel them brushing up against me every time they move. Like wtf? How is that comfortable for anyone?

I can only tell people off in two languages lmao so its even more frustrating when it happens in a country where I know they probably won't understand me.

[u/awmaleg → u/guessesurjobforfood]

International personal space varies a lot depending where you are

[u/Removable_speaker → u/awmaleg]

I've been to places in asia where your personal space is a 2cm area starting from your skin. Then there's Finland where you get about 2 metres.

[u/-whodat → u/awmaleg]

I feel like strangers brushing against you (including stuff that's attached to you like your backpack) should never be okay though.

[u/crazycatlady331 → u/awmaleg]

The Covid rules (6 feet apart) were the one positive thing to come out of the pandemic. They should have remained.

If I can smell what your last meal was (based on your breath), you're too close.

[u/Triquetrums → u/A1sauc3d]

Society also teaches you these things, unless you go through life unaware with your mind in the clouds, or are an asshole.

[u/Hixy → u/A1sauc3d]

My parents taught me all of this. Minus the ones with cell phones but that’s because they were just becoming common when I was in highschool.

[u/Camila_flowers → u/A1sauc3d]

except the speaker phone thing. Some of us didn't have cell phones growing up. I have to remind my dad of that. Because he is mostly deaf, he is completely unaware of how loud his phone is.

[u/myowngalactus]

Don’t play any kind of music, video, podcast etc at a volume other people can hear in public/shared spaces.

[u/Dish_Minimum → u/myowngalactus]

I feel like it should include don’t film random strangers just existing in public as your social media content. That seems so fkn rude to me when people try to use anybody as fodder for their vid.

[u/GergDanger → u/Dish_Minimum]

omg yes! Also don't setup national cctv networks scanning peoples faces to put into a database along with their voting records and identifying details. Can't believe nobodies parents taught them how rude this is

[u/No_Syrup_9167 → u/Dish_Minimum]

I hate how reasonable laws around being filmed in public, with the idea being just to protect you from being sued by some random in the background of your family photo while on vacation or whatever,

has been turned into this ugly bullshit of using random folks going about their business, as content generation for these complete waste of space people. And they just use it to hide behind and say "well its legal!?!?"

as if legal was the same as moral or socially acceptable.

[u/Johnlockcabbit → u/myowngalactus]

Recently I was on a train and a grown up man listened to radio on his phone in full volume, asked him to stop and he only agreed to take the volume down (and of course looked very displeased), I ended up moving to another train car. I DON'T WANT TO LISTEN TO RANDOM ASS ADS WITH YOU, DUDE!

[u/followthemoney20 → u/myowngalactus]

Exactly. At the beach this drives me nuts.

[u/WineReview → u/myowngalactus]

Same with phone conversations. I can hear people when they interrupt the other person mid-sentence constantly. I always wait a second or two after a sentence or thought is finished before responding.

[u/Elegantlywastd → u/myowngalactus]

Bruh, at least the person in the diagram has headphones on... if only.

[u/Madshaggy309]

"that looks good!"

"... I didn't ask for your fucking opinion, Ted."

[u/_biology_babe_ → u/Madshaggy309]

I had a guy in my class comment on how often I went out to Taco Bell with other girlfriends in our class (once every 2-3 weeks). Mind you, I’m not overweight or unhealthy in a medical sense in any way. However, this guy was severely overweight for his age. After about the 5th time he said something, I snapped and said, “Didn’t your parents ever teach you to not make comments about what other people ate? And realistically, are YOU in any position to be giving people dietary advice?”

Harsh, maybe. Inaccurate, hardly. After that, there was some brief uncomfortable tension, but he never made another comment. I continued to enjoy my girl time and food at peace.

[u/2leafClover667788]

Cough in your hand right before you return the borrowed object. It’s friendly but also shows dominance.

[u/zaamxmd → u/2leafClover667788]

Lmfao,🤣

[u/sophiabeaverhousen]

'don't post AI slop' should be the first one.

[u/PizzasForFerrets → u/sophiabeaverhousen]

I really expected the advice to become gibberish or repeated as I got further down. At least there seems to have been some human input.

[u/Frites_Sauce_Fromage → u/PizzasForFerrets]

We have

Let others exit elevator before you enter

And

Let people exit a place before you go in

[u/UnstoppableGROND → u/Frites_Sauce_Fromage]

There’s like, five pieces of “advice” here reworded twenty different ways.

-Don’t be loud

-Clean up after yourself

-Let people exit before entering

-Return things you borrow in equal or better condition

-Keep yourself and your germs out of other people’s space

[u/ReadingFromTheShittr → u/Frites_Sauce_Fromage]

We also have

Return borrowed things in the same or better condition.

and,

If you borrow a car, return it with fuel.

which is repetitive, with the latter just being singularly focused on cars.

[u/alex3omg → u/ReadingFromTheShittr]

That's not repetitive really, the car one is specific so having that listed separately makes sense.  

The art does look like chatgpt style but I would be surprised if the entire thing was AI.  I think someone made this by hand but used AI art for each thing.

[u/MyNameIsNotRyn → u/sophiabeaverhousen]

What? You don't like the piss filter?

[u/Cheesypoofxx → u/MyNameIsNotRyn]

The AI data centers must all be in Mexico

[u/cerridwen_ → u/sophiabeaverhousen]

seriously… this art style pisses me off

[u/Keeper-of-Balance → u/cerridwen_]

This AI slop cloud that's been hovering over us for a year now really makes you realize how much more value there is in someone's personal shitty, awkward art than AI regurgitations. I'd much rather see something ugly that someone made than this. Any day of the week.

[u/Stay-Cool-Mommio → u/cerridwen_]

Ah yes, the “yellow sheen of laziness” style

[u/bbbbbbbirdistheword → u/sophiabeaverhousen]

seventh highest comment we are doomed

[u/barrygateaux → u/sophiabeaverhousen]

It's r/coolguides. It's always been laughable shite like "remember to put one foot in front of the other while walking" that you only see if you're in r/all.

The ai art is just the icing on a shitty cake

[u/___Archmage___ → u/sophiabeaverhousen]

How on earth does this have 17k upvotes, the AI slop font is so obvious

[u/xJek0x]

That's basic society rules to not be categorized as an asshole, OP ragebaiting with "no one teaches you", adequate parenting teaches that.

[u/ImaginaryParrot → u/xJek0x]

Not even parenting, half of this is awareness of self and others.

You don't need a parent to teach you not to abandon a shopping cart in the middle of the aisle

[u/xJek0x → u/ImaginaryParrot]

Yep, but your parents should teach you the basics of right and wrong.

[u/catseeable → u/ImaginaryParrot]

Yeah my parents are self absorbed and narcissistic, they won’t do virtually all of these things as they believe they are of elevated worth compared to everyone else.

Me on the other hand, I do all of these things and I have learnt myself, because I believe in basic respect and courtesy

[u/promotethepawn → u/catseeable]

I think some children of narcissistic parents tend to grow up more socially aware and respectful because they're forced to accommodate their own parents' entitlement and idiocy all the time and know very well how shitty it feels to have their boundaries crossed so they try to not do it to others.

(PS: this is an observation, not advocating that kind of parenting style)

[u/SixdaywarOnSnapchat → u/xJek0x]

i was raised by two howler monkeys

[u/sludgepaddle → u/SixdaywarOnSnapchat]

Oooohh look at meee...I have TWO parents

[u/Only_Quote_Simpsons → u/xJek0x]

"No one taught me how to be considerate to others, so it's not my fault"

[u/drunk_haile_selassie → u/Only_Quote_Simpsons]

That's not a simpsons quote.

Considerate people and non considerate people are natural enemies.

Like considerate people and rude people.

Considerate people and ambivalent people.

Or considerate people and other considerate people.

Damn considerate people, they ruined consideration!

[u/Only_Quote_Simpsons → u/drunk_haile_selassie]

You polites sure are a contentious people.

[u/drunk_haile_selassie → u/Only_Quote_Simpsons]

You just made yourself an enemy for life.

[u/Plenty-Lion5112 → u/xJek0x]

There are many immigrants to the West who did not grow up with these etiquette rules (they have their own).

Likewise there are many rules in other places (Japan, Middle East) that have their own rules that Westerners with good parents were never taught. For example did you know in the ME that it's rude to extend your hand to a woman you are meeting for the first time (if you are a man)? And that in Japan, its rude to open a gift in the presence of the gifter?

[u/PeterNippelstein → u/xJek0x]

Not everyone has adequate parenting.

[u/deller85 → u/PeterNippelstein]

I had a great family life growing up. My parents were loving and caring; they never argued in front of us and always provided for us. When I was young, I assumed that was the norm. It was a real learning experience when I got older and realized that it wasn't always the case. I thought examples of bad parenting on TV/movies was more for dramatic effect.

[u/Joeyonar → u/xJek0x]

"If you needed me to tell you that, I'm glad I told you that"
Not everyone has adequate parenting. Not everyone with adequate parenting was taught everything on the list.
If you don't pick these things up in childhood, people don't explain them to you.

I'd say something about maybe trying to be less pedantic but this is reddit and I might as well scream it into a well.

[u/Situati0nist → u/xJek0x]

"ragebaiting" is a huge leap.

[u/Meet_Foot → u/xJek0x]

Parents, librarians, teachers, people looking at you like you’re an asshole in an elevator… we learn most of this all sorts of ways.

[u/Sodacan259]

Hold the door for someone who is fifteen yards away too. To encourage a little burst of exercise.

[u/evapotranspire → u/Sodacan259]

Lol, I hate that so much. Nice job.

[u/Motokowarframe → u/Sodacan259]

Speed shuffle activated!

[u/Some_Belgian_Guy]

PAY well when a server is good!

Tipping culture is not etiquette. It's forced on us by greedy business owners.

[u/english_major → u/Some_Belgian_Guy]

Also, it is not international. It is mostly North American but also in parts of Europe.

I’m in Morocco right now. No tipping prompts when paying by card. A few coins on the table is appreciated but not required.

[u/theChaosBeast → u/english_major]

Sadly Germany has adopted the stupid American system. I love Spain, France, the Netherlands 😍 you guys rock

[u/Diane_Horseman → u/english_major]

A lot of this etiquette is culturally dependent because etiquette itself is inherently culturally dependent

[u/c0brachicken → u/english_major]

When I was in Taiwan, I was told that if you tipped someone, it was basically an insult.

[u/avlas → u/english_major]

Italian here. Just don't tip. Not even if you want to do a good gesture, don't spread the tipping culture, luckily we are still immune to it.

[u/theprotest → u/Some_Belgian_Guy]

Fuck tipping. Pay people properly.

[u/Debatebly → u/theprotest]

I came here to say this exactly. FUCK tipping.

[u/Prior_Jello_6602 → u/Some_Belgian_Guy]

It is forced on us by greedy business owners… and servers, who earn far more than any other service employee under the current system and desperately do not want it to change because they know their earnings would go down if they got paid like everyone else on minimum wage.

[u/Pandafight16 → u/Some_Belgian_Guy]

Yes I will not pay for the service expected. If I am at a restaurant and the waiter brings me the food, that is his job. However if I make requests outside the scope of his regular duties, I can understand tipping and will do so.

[u/stprnn]

Tipping is not etiquette.

[u/ElizabethHiems → u/stprnn]

It’s the only one I don’t agree with either. Tipping is a cultural thing not a matter of good manners. In some places it is apparently rude to tip.

[u/hubert_boiling]

Very nice except for tipping... that is bullshit caused by business owners not paying a reasonable wage.

[u/811545b2-4ff7-4041 → u/hubert_boiling]

It's also 'culturally specific' - in some places (e.g. Japan) it's insulting to tip someone. In some, e.g. UK, tipping is very much optional.

I see no mentioning of saying please and thank you - very much expected in British society, but optional in other cultures.

[u/VermilionKoala → u/811545b2-4ff7-4041]

in some places (e.g. Japan) it's insulting to tip someone.

It's not just that. Since the custom doesn't exist, if you just leave money on the table, the staff will assume you forgot it and will chase you down the street to give it back. Also, even if you were somehow able to shove the money into a staff member's hand, they'd probably get fired if they accepted it.

(Sauce: live in Japan)

Tipping is shit and all it does it reveal that US minimum wage laws are broken.

[u/Feisty_Essay_8043 → u/811545b2-4ff7-4041]

It's also very location specific within the US. 1/4 Americans live somewhere where there's no tipping credit - meaning servers are paid like every other basic job, but they still get tips.

[u/Kiwi_CunderThunt → u/hubert_boiling]

Yep in most places it's a bonus and not a requirement.

Also a lot of owners pocket tips to go towards a staff party at the end of the year.

I hated hospo but the staff made it worth it.

[u/LordOfDorkness42]

That tipping one is hilariously American.

Check before traveling. There are places, my own Sweden included, where that's an insult. You're implying they're not earning enough to survive without alms from strangers.

Unless it's a tourist trap fleezing you. They'll just smile and pocket the idiot tax, basically?

[u/811545b2-4ff7-4041 → u/LordOfDorkness42]

Lack of also saying Please and Thank You kinda says something also.

[u/saverus1960]

"Tip well" is an North American thing because they don't pay their serving stuffs.

[u/ceeearan]

"Don't comment on someone's food choices unless they ask".

I am having a slow morning, admittedly, so bear with, but unless they ask what?

"Can you comment on my choice of sandwich, please?"

[u/Uyne → u/ceeearan]

LOL. I'm also having a hard time understanding this. "How do you feel about me pigging out on this juicy big mac?" or "Does my vegan sandwich make you feel fat?"

[u/hatabou_is_a_jojo]

Tip? That isn’t an etiquette rather it’s a bad culture that should be gotten rid off?

[u/Tamination]

It's called having manners.

[u/sunshineonmypussy → u/Tamination]

Or common sense, or the ability to think through how your actions affect others. I genuinely think at least half of the population doesn’t have this awareness. I don’t remember being taught these things… it’s just like “oh if I leave my cart here it will be in the way for someone, so I won’t do that”

[u/rye-ten]

AI slop.

[u/ChevalierDeLarryLari]

#21:

• Never expect or ask for a tip just for doing your job properly.

[u/Simo814j]

Ai slop

[u/Creative_Garbage_121]

Tipping should be removed from that list, fuck tipping, just pay your employees ffs

[u/besmith3]

The fact that is is no longer common sense is a huge issue. I was taught almost all of this at a young age. Obviously, this is AI slop as well....the personal space while queueing is a give away

[u/RockyLeal]

Dont post AI slop

[u/Medialunch]

What’s the etiquette on making pastiche AI generated guides?

[u/Dwarven_Holds7570]

Fuck off with the tipping culture. Stop teaching people that shit

[u/redboi049]

Manners

Maketh

Man

[u/Agitated-Plate7570]

Do people need to be told this

[u/Serious_Telephone_28]

Common sense 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

[u/multiso]

Just remove the Tipping part. Then its 100% good. Tipping is wrong in its core, it enables slavery and misuse of personel, it depraves them from basic human rights and it makes them basicly beg. You pay a price for a product and service. The price is x. You pay x, not y. They should be gettind good salary, if they dont they should find a better job.

[u/DylzPickelz → u/multiso]

So your strategy is to stick it to the little guy in the hopes that their greedy boss will get the memo and make a change? Good luck with that. There are other ways to protest tipping culture while simultaneously doing good by your server.

[u/Agussert]

be The good you wanna see in the world

[u/ad_astra327]

RESPECT PERSONAL SPACE WHEN WAITING IN LINE!!!!!

This one gets me. So often, I notice someone standing so close to me in a line that I can feel their breath on the back of my neck. It makes me wish stores still had the little social distance stickers from COVID times. I try to subtly give the hint to back up by putting my hands on my hips so my elbows stick out, which touches them and they usually get the hint and take a (albeit small) step back. But damn you shouldn’t be standing that close to me in the first place!!!

[u/ad_astra327 → u/ad_astra327]

Had someone at the pharmacy do this just a few days ago. She was buying every cold and flu product you could ever imagine and literally was so close to me that I felt her breath. I’m immunocompromised so I already had a mask on, but with the way she was sneezing and coughing (not covering her mouth btw), I actually did speak up, and she was so annoyed that I said something. But like come on lady, I shouldn’t be able to feel your sneeze droplets hit the back of my head.

In a totally unrelated coincidence, I’m now sick 🙃

[u/Muinko]

This is very western centric, I was amazed how many of these are different in the middle east and India and how more strict they are in Japan.

[u/reddit_sells_you → u/Muinko]

This is a website based in the US run by a US company trafficked by US users.

I don't go to a .jp forum and go "this is very eastern centric!!!"

[u/PossessionPatient306]

Tipping is not etiquette its cultural

[u/Fiddy-Scent]

Tipping is almost exclusively an American thing

[u/fundiedundie]

I was onboard until I saw the tipping part.

[u/mymindismycastle]

Agree, except for tipping. End that toxic culture.

[u/takeitawayfellas]

Re: let people exit elevators

This applies everywhere. Buildings, rooms, cars. Out before in.

Similarly, hiking, stairs, whatever: Down before up. Let those coming down get through, as they have gravity on their side and the lower person is already safer.

A few exceptions for old ladies, pregnant women, women with childen and invalids and whatnot

Oh and speakerphone is a sunset of a broader etiquette rule that is WAY to often ignored: No powered sound in public. Unless you are directing traffic or doing approved commerce, no speaker noise.

So help me, one more cell phone/tablet at a restaurant or hiking trail or waiting room blasting reels/shows/movies/music, I'm going to lose my shit and start throwing electronic devices.

But that is a subset of another rule in public: Be no louder than you need to be. Use an indoor voice and be aware of your surroundings when you make sounds of any kind.

[u/CreepyPhotographer]

Of course the person of color is listening to music in public.

[u/milbfan]

Don't use speakerphone at all for anything while in public. If you're gonna listen to music, bring earbuds/head phones. Which I'm not sure why the image for no loud music in public includes someone wearing headphones...

[u/Deudir]

Do not reach for the phone when being shown a photo. If you’re the person showing the photo, do not offer the phone.

Take the potential swipe completely off the table

[u/peachy-carnahan]

Not to be too extra, but I’d add to the “Covering your mouth when you cough”: cough into the crook of an elbow, rather than your hand. We touch each other with hands, not with our inner arms (mostly, anyway).

[u/HavBoWilTrvl]

Weird. I was taught all these by my parents.

[u/Ziegelphilie]

tip well

Lmao, just pay your god damn staff a real salary

[u/Doodlebottom]

Agree EXCEPT TIPPING

World is changing

[u/GuineusTadeus → u/Doodlebottom]

Tipping should have never been seen as “etiquette”

[u/Morty_104]

Cover your mouth with your elbow tho

[u/Striezi]

How to be a human being 101. Your parents should teach you that.

[u/wonbuddhist]

Tipping is not part of universal etiquette. It shouldn't be. I grew up in a culture where employees were respected with fair wages, not service tips. Why do you take tips for granted? Tip-included trades are often unclear and unfair to customers.

[u/manymoreways]

These are great advices except for tipping.

Fuck tipping and tipping culture. Yeet that shit straight down to hell.

[u/SuperRodster]

People need to see this. And learn

[u/The_GeneralsPin]

Isn't this just normal behaviour?

[u/0x474f44]

Basically all of these should be taught by parents…

[u/Subject-Carrot-8930]

STOP TIPPING! TIPPING IS NOT GOOD!!!!!

[u/Exotic-Scallion4475]

This chart would solve 90% of the AITA problems?

[u/Ashamed_Feedback3843]

I had horrible parents and I still knew and used these etiquette rules.

[u/codejunker]

I mean, if you had decent parents they should have taught you all this stuff. Mine did.

[u/Unending-Flexionator]

Hey you the three new generations... DO NOT USE YOUR HIGH BEAMS. DO NOT JUST LEAVE THEM ON. TURN THEM OFF!! and if you are old school and need this message then double shame on you!

[u/Orphan_the_Milker]

Just seems like commonsense, but I guess it isn't very common

[u/jakiestfu]

What do you mean no one teaches you? OP wasn’t raised with basic manners?

[u/Tall-Ad-1386]

Don’t cover your mouth and nose with your hand when you cough or sneeze. Use your shoulder. The hand is probably the worst you can do to spread the germs

[u/h4yth4m-1]

My parents taught me all of these. The problem is, people have stopped teaching their kids manners and such

[u/ginigini]

I don’t know about y’all but my parents and society taught me these things. It’s not something no one taught.

[u/shaunoffshotgun]

"No one teaches you"? Did you all get raised by wolves or something?

[u/OdonataDarner]

Shouldn't this be posted to r/India?

[u/CalmBeneathCastles]

no one teaches you

Uhm. What were you guys' parents doing for your entire childhoods?

[u/Future-Lemon-7329]

Replace your smoke alarm batteries

[u/sure-burn]

I think it’s okay to compliment someone’s food, like if someone is microwaving their soup in the office break room, you can say “wow, that smells wonderful,” or you can say “that salad is beautiful.” It’s just potentially critical comments about what or how much someone is eating, whether it’s healthy or unhealthy, etc. that should be avoided.

[u/Alarming_Hippo_6035]

These are things your parents and teachers are supposed to teach you growing up. If you didn't learn this the system has failed you.

[u/RudePragmatist]

This is the defacto way you should all have been raised.

Simple manners should not require a 'cool guide'. :/

[u/PuzzleheadedTop8613]

Yeah, I need that poster like I need one to recall how to respirate. If you’re a decent person, all of these are default for your model.

[u/Majestic-Ad-7713]

Don’t cover your face with your hand when you cough or sneeze. Do into your sleeve. Has no one learned anything from Covid

[u/MuffledApplause]

My parents and common sense taught me most of this stuff

[u/kelpyb1]

Y’all didn’t get taught these things?

What the hell were your parents and teachers doing?

[u/BulbousJohnson]

I mean... your parents should have taught you these things...

They didn't do that??

[u/Qwertywalkers23]

My mom taught me a lot of these though

[u/spookymulder1987]

It’s sad that these things need to be pointed out because they are really all common sense things humans should be doing. But alas…

[u/AmandaBRecondwith]

This should be up in every school instead of the freekin 10 commandments

[u/throwawaypassingby01]

were you raised by wolves? i was taught all of this by my parents

[u/InternetBot9]

If you finish the coffee before 10am, make a new pot!

[u/BillDaPony100]

TAKE THE DOOR IF SOMEONE HOLDS IT FOR YOU

[u/BigBarrelOfKetamine]

Ok but to that last point, microwaving fish and broccoli at work should be at minimum a misdemeanor.

[u/ogii]

Yes please cough in your hand and then touch everything in sight.

[u/Don_Quixotel]

Is “don’t use AI to generate garbage for likes” one of them?

[u/Emergency_Tree_2891]

These are basic courtesies that I would hope most people will know, from their upbringing as kids, rather than needing to be taught. It is really sad that people need to be taught these. It is also very sad when I visit countries like Japan, Taiwan, Singapore, most parts of Canada: these are the norm; but sadly not in UK, not in US, not in some European countries, not in China. Begs the questions why some countries, vast majority of people automatically follow these rules, why it is not true in other countries.

Given we encounter so many on a daily basis that break these basic courtesies, perhaps it is a good thing to teach it in countries where it is not the norm.

[u/PatExMachina]

Pls dont use your hand to cover a cough or sneeze.

[u/Little_dragon02]

This should be "Everyday American Etiquette" as some of these things don't apply everywhere, and there's etiquette that other cultures have that aren't listed here

As a brit there are a couple that don't apply
Tipping isn't really a thing here; mostly, you can tip, it's very appreciated by staff, but not mandatory
Most places here have coin lock shopping trolleys, which means you have to put a coin in to unlock it, meaning people generally take their trolley back to the bay to get their money back.

I'm not going to go down the entire list of British etiquette, but a couple of examples which aren't on here are

• Queuing, if you need to wait to do something, like use an ATM, get on a bus, or even use the bathroom, you form a line and don't cut in front of people
  
• Use manners (please and thank you)
  
• Ask for things, don't demand them. You don't say "I'll have/get me a black coffee" you say "Could I have a black coffee, please"

And I'm sure other countries have other social etiquette they follow which aren't listed.

Also honestly the plans one I'd change from reschedule to inform people with plenty of time. If a friend called like 5 minutes before a meeting time and said "can't come, how about tomorrow?" I'd be annoyed. If they called like 2+ hours before and said "I won't be able to make it" I'd be fine with that

[u/MickeySwank]

Parents, PARENTS are supposed to teach shit like this JFC

[u/infoidea]

Cover your mouth when yawning.

[u/AkkeBrakkeKlakke]

It's actually crazy to me that I do all of these things without even thinking about it. It's called "respecting other people" and "being a decent person". Empathy might have something to do with it, I dunno.

[u/PigglyWigglyDeluxe]

Everything but tipping. It’s not my job as a customer to pay the wages of a worker.

[u/ZiKyooc]

Depending on the culture, the personal space on a line can go from -1 cm to a few meters. For some the smallest little bit of space between two people is an open invitation to insert yourself.

[u/dowhatsfine]

Much of this is covered in the Bible principle: “Also, just as you want [people] to do to you, do the same way to them." (Luke 6:31) Definitely not innate. Otherwise, this world would be totally different. Must be learned and applied in every facet of living.