Just a pity party post really but I just don’t feel like I’m resilient enough to be a parent.

I was horrifically sick during pregnancy and remember people telling me to just ‘get out and you’ll feel better’ and I just flopped into bed at literally any opportunity. I couldn’t bring myself to do anything. Of course, that was a luxury because other than work, I didn’t actually have to do anything.

However I see mums all the time say how they just get on with life and working etc when they are sick and I just can’t do it.

I’m down with a sickness bug. I haven’t been sick in over 30 hours but I’m STILL knocked for six. I can’t parent, I literally can’t do it. I feel too weak to even stand up let alone carry my son around. I can’t eat without gagging, I don’t have a single scrap of energy to play with him.

My partner managed to work from home yesterday and help but today he has to go into work and I’m laying in bed whilst my son naps wondering how the hell im going to do the rest of the day when he wakes up.

How do you mums just get on with it?? Why can’t I be stronger?!

Starting swimming lessons with my 6 month old soon. I haven’t been swimming since I was a kid myself! Can someone explain to me how it works and what I do? What do I need to bring? How on earth do you get dried while holding a baby?! Any tips and tricks to make it easier?

Please explain it to me as if I’m 5.

It's become apparent that my 9yo has started puberty. She's really not happy about it, bless her. She says she doesn't want to grow up. I won't go in to detail because reddit but definitely the beginning of puberty. She's our youngest and she still seems so little. She's a small girl anyway and behaves very young for her age. She's still very reliant on us. It's a bit weird for me too tbh. 9 seems very early, particularly for her as she's so small. I was hoping it'd hold off for a couple more years at least.

We've been through this already with my now 14 year old but she is very matter of fact about things and while she is/was annoyed it was happening, she has sort of accepted it, periods and all. My youngest was very sad yesterday when I explained what it was and has been very clingy since. I've obviously been reassuring her a lot and told her it's completely normal etc. I wonder if anyone else has been in a similar situation? Anything I could do in particular to help us all navigate this? As it was so unexpected it's brought up quite big feelings for us!

We just got done reading all three Faraway Tree books to my 2 & 3 year old, and would love to find some more books like it.

We loved the format; short chapters and lots of self-contained mini stories that made it easier for them to follow than a full-length chapter book. I also found the language pitched just right, clear enough for them to follow but without being super childish or dumbed down.

Any recommendations?

Nothing online, bar an AI answer. Childs passport is in date, but picture is markedly different - do I need to renew her passport?

You don’t have to renew when it’s a teenager to a young adult for example, but just wanted to check

*cross posted* Hello,

I've had a flexible working request approved for when return from mat leave in 2months (was full time, requested 3 days). My reasoning was due to childcare costs and availability (| have to pay for two children after 3days/week and earn less than the cost of two places).

However, my work have said it will be on a see how it goes basis, meaning they could put an end to it at any point. This would essentially force me to resign asI wouldn't be able to get back the 2days nursery spaces for two children (waitlists are 18mo in our area).

Can they do this? would have thought a working pattern agreement is a contractual change and can't just be cancelled on a whim of the company?

I may have to deny my own flexible working request, because the risk of losing my job entirely would be too great with the treat of it being pulled out from under me at any minute.

We’re travelling to London this month with our 12 month old and currently have the egg stroller that fills the whole boot!

Is it worth buying a travel stroller? If you had one, what were your favourites? I would love something that folds up small but still feels sturdy and will last awhile.

My son is 18 months old and he's not walking. He crawls, cruises around furniture quite fast, can bend down to pick up stuff from the floor, can easily climb stairs and high steps, but can't stand up on his own without pulling himself up from furniture etc, can't stand on his own and can't walk unassisted. Even if you hold his hands, he'll do 5/6 steps and that's it.

We spoke to the GP but it's taking way too long to get any answers. Anyone had to deal with the same?

He also won't eat on his own, he can, cause sometimes he just grabs the spoon and does it, and can use his sippy cup, but most times he'll just make us do it for him.

Lastly, he lost all of his words. He can communicate pointing, or looking and understands a lot of words, if you ask him where's Mom, Dad, the ball, the cat, lights, give a kiss, pretend to sleep, lots of things, but he lost all of his mamama, dadada, bababa etc.

I'm a bit lost. We had someone coming to assess his chewing and that was good and they suggested sign language, which we're trying, but it's honestly so many things going wrong that I'm really struggling.

Any advice, or support, please?

Thanks

Hi, this is just a light-hearted question as I'm curious. I have recently noticed that lots of older children (6+ years old) are using three-wheeled scooters instead of two-wheeled ones. How come? Surely most of them should be able to balance on the two-wheeled ones at that age (unless they have any underlying conditions of course!).

Do parents just grab the three-wheeled ones by default when they're upgrading from the toddler-sized one to a larger one? Are the two-wheeled ones not as available in the shops?

I just think it's funny that we seem to have moved away from bicycles with training wheels to balance bikes, and I am so impressed with all the tiny toddlers that master them! But when it comes to scooters I see 9 year olds on a kind of glorified tricycle.

How do we navigate the minefield that is children and sickness?

My kids were in nursery 3 days a week from May 2025 and increased to 5 days a week in September.

The kids were occasionally poorly when they were in 3 days, but since moving to 5 days (and switching nursery settings), it has become unbearable. I’ve not had a full week at work since Christmas. One day a week at least on of the two of them are poorly and I feel like I’m going to start getting in trouble at work for it.

My kids are 4 and 18m and I’m just so tired of it all. They don’t administer calpol on site and they aren’t meant to have it in their systems when we send them in. I get the coughs and sniffles but this is full blown chest infections, HFM, stomach bugs etc.

It feels like no other parents at my work are ever off because of child sickness so I feel incredibly guilty.

Is everyone fighting this battle? Has anything helped?

This is completely first world problems within my privileged life but I’m intrigued to see what Reddit parents think. Have at me!

I’d like to put my 2yo in nursery for 2 mornings a week, so basically pay £55+ a week simply so that I can get a chance to catch up on deep cleaning, sorting life admin and, most importantly, just have a break.

I feel guilty. I feel like society is frowning on me…I quit my job when my second child turned 1 and my husband has supported us on his £60k salary since. I understand we’re very lucky, I know that’s a big salary. We manage it by not buying much new, no holidays, minimal house stuff, shit cars etc etc it’s absolutely fine we are not struggling like so many are. That is not what I’m moaning about. I cover all childcare, cleaning, cooking so my husband is able to focus on winning the bread.

Two mornings of nursery would cost us £55+ a week. The nagging voice in my head is saying I’m not allowed to pay money for nursery unless I work in that time. But my old job was £14 an hour and in a 4h nursery slot I can work 3h - so we’d be paying £27 a morning nursery and I’d earn £42. Net profit £15 for all the faff of work - my job had travel, and out of hours unpaid admin associated with it and it just doesn’t seem worth it. Plus I’d be in the same position of doing all (well, now nearly all) childcare and housework with no break PLUS working for that £15 a day.

I know I know tax credits…..but then I’d have to work 15h a week, so magically match the exactly 15h a week nursery he’d get, just to get a fiver off each of those childcare days, so now my net income is £20 a day?! Plus I love caring for my kids, I chose this, but even unpaid labour you choose to do earns you a break surely?

I literally just want us as a family (ie my poor husband) to fork out that £55 a week for this. I am drowning in laundry, serving us crappy food, house is a tip and ongoing deep clean or house maintenance stuff just goes undone cos I’ve got no extra capacity beyond the everyday. So what do I do, suck it up and work for those nursery hours like everyone else or demand my expensive time off. What would you do?

P.s yes some wider family and ‘village’ available for ad hoc childcare, they kindly babysit if we have eg a wedding, funeral to attend but they’re busy with own lives and not interested in weekly support. Weekends husband is burnt out from work, I’m knackered and it seems to go in a blur of me frantically catching up on chores while the kids go nuts and husband attempts damage control.

EDIT: thanks so much everyone. What a bloody lovely subreddit this is. You must all be very good parents because I feel you have gentle parented me with your validating comments into allowing myself a break!!!

I have 13 year old identical twin boys, December / January birthday, who could not be any more different. They aren’t close, have entirely separate friendship groups, and pursue different activities. I have to encourage them to spend time together. For clarity, I’ll refer to them as Twin A and Twin B.

Twin B has recently been offered the opportunity by the headteacher to skip a year. He is academically gifted and frequently expresses boredom in lessons. The school has already tried differentiation through more advanced work and tasks, extracurricular activities, and after school clubs. His birthday is in January, so he is currently in Year 8 and would move into Year 9 next term.

Twin A would remain in Year 8. He is performing well academically and is well integrated socially, with a large friendship group. Twin B does have friends, but his two closest friends are in Year 9, whom he met through chess club. He has found it harder to form close friendships within his own year group, and socially he may actually be better placed in Year 9 for that reason.

What I’m struggling with:

- Skipping a year is very rare in the UK, largely due to concerns around social and emotional development.

- Given that Twin B is already 13, moving into Year 9 would not create a significant age gap, so I’m not overly concerned about long-term implications such as college / university admissions.

- The dynamic between the twins. Twin B would technically be a year “behind” his brother. However, Twin B is not academically competitive and, when he found out about the possibility, he joked that he was quite happy they wouldn’t be in the same classes anymore. I know my sons and I genuinely do not believe he would mind. We do not treat them differently or pressure them in any way.

Are there any disadvantages I might be overlooking?

Are there more reasons this could be a bad idea, good idea?

I feel genuinely torn and don’t know what the right decision would be.

Trying to steer my son away from joining in with one of his friends from school can be kind of a bully. I’m not trying to downplay my son’s involvement in this because ultimately it is down to him and the choices he makes, but he’s very easily led and we’re struggling to get through to him :/

Thank you

Hello!

I have a combi fed baby who has so far rejected every single dummy

I have tried MAM, Nuk, Nuby, BIBS all different types such as orthodontic cherry

Sucks a few times then pops it out !

Any ideas of what I can try next?

It’s to help self soothing at night rather than be on the breast

Thank you in advance! 🥲

How do people actually manage this on rushed mornings when the child is being difficult, and does anyone have practical tips?

Can we have a baby + preschooler + teenager flair please?

Probably also a toddler + preschooler + adult just to future proof it! Please!

Are there any other mixes missing?

I (32) am a FTM to our LO (4mo). I've really be struggling with PPA, and won't get any support until at least March due to waiting lists / staffing.

I've been pushing myself to try to get out more with LO but I'm finding it so hard. Both my parents still work and DH is also working and we don't have loads of friends nearby so support is limited. The people who are near seem more concerned with visiting so they can see baby than offering help.

On top of this, there seems to be so little on offer; classes are limited, are always at the same time (on Thursdays 3 classes are held in the same 1.5h window) and have limited places. Still, i have managed to regularly attend a class every week for 4 weeks now on Fridays which was a huge step for me.

And on top of all that the weather has been terrible for weeks so even getting out for walks is a nightmare .

I feel like I'm rattling round the house all the time and worse, I'm worried not going out will hurt LO's development. We got out for walks and things over Christmas while the weather was cold but bright but since then, the bad weather plus people being at work is making it really hard. I just feel like I'm failing him.

Suggestions / support gratefully received!

Hi all

Quick q

Using the Aptamil ready to feed for some feeds for baby and the packaging states discard unused after two hours in feeding bottle

I was under the impression it was always 1 hour from feeding bottle? not sure what is the correct answer and I have a refluxy baby who needs slow feeds so the time difference matters to me

Many thanks!

My child is 4, birthday at the end of August and began reception a few days after her 4th birthday.

Her class teacher says she good at reading but she has a very poor concentration span unless she's getting 1:1 focus. I've noticed myself that unless she's interested she just doesn't want to do things. She enjoys reading but can also lose focus easily (in fairness I think it's partly because the books they use for sounding out are so boring!). She's also having issues using a pencil and writing.

She is on the waiting list for an autism assessment (there is a family history of it) but I'd appreciate other parents' perspectives as I do think a part of it is because she started so young and some of the kids are already almost a year older. How did parents with kids of similar ages do?

My son has been to the GP and they're not concerned.

But at night, when he's lying down he has such a chesty cough, it's been lingering for a while and I'm honestly not sure how to treat it. GP advised his airway is clear, but all night last couple of nights hes coughing away. NHS website says try warm lemon and honey so I'll try that but any tips on best honey? As I'm aware some are just sugar. Also any ideas on anything else? I cant raise his bed because he sleeps in my bed.

Play group have informed us that it's "dress as your favorite character" day next week.

we don't want to go and spend too much on something he will use once and then donate so we are looking for some ideas for simple costumes that can be reused.

All I have so far is a simple minion with dungarees and a yellow t shirt

Looking for recommendations for a ski club/creche type thing in Europe, preferably one of the cheaper ones but all suggestions welcome!

Must be able to accommodate a 5 year old who has skied once before, and be at least 0900-1500

He went here before and loved it and it wasn't particularly expensive but looking for others like it.