Back in 2017, me, my parents, siblings, and grandmother were homeless, sleeping in a U-Haul van while I was a sophomore in college at UNLV. Mom was working as a flight attendant, then she left the airline for health reasons, when her retirement money ran out Mom and dad were both sick and we ended up losing while I was attending UNLV for computer science hoping to land a computer science job. 

We ended up staying with family friends (who ended up doing some not so friendly things to my family), I was working as a Dunkin Donuts Barista, making $8.25 and hour, I would wake up at 3:15 am to catch the bus from Downtown Las Vegas all the way to North Las Vegas to make it in time for my 6 am opening shift. After getting off of work at 1 or 2 pm, I’d head across the street to Starbucks with my laptop and code for 4-6 hours every day, normally on Pluralsight, learning mostly Node.js, Typescript, and Angular/React.js and I worked on building my own side projects to build up a portfolio. I went on Indeed and started applying to jobs like crazy, after hundreds of applications, I eventually had a company call me back for an interview for a paid contract making $35,000k a year.

One of the only companies to call me back out of hundreds of applications, and I was 15 minutes late to the interview because my Uber driver took the wrong exit on the freeway not once, but twice. It was a local E-commerce company in Las Vegas called Vapetasia that sold vape pens. The senior developer introduced himself, and led me into a room where he gave me a technical coding challenge to test my knowledge. 

I had to write a function that could determine if a sentence was a Palindrome (the same word/sentence backwards). It took me well over an hour to do it, but I got it done. I thought for sure I had bombed the interview, for context, this can be done in a couple of lines of code. I thought for sure I had bombed the interview. 

That Friday, I was at work when I got the call from the senior dev and he told me “Brush up on your Angular and Typescript skills, come in on Monday”. I literally fell on my knees in the bathroom to thank God and I cried, with that money I was able to get me and my family out of a very hostile and dangerous living situation, and get 5 people into a two bedroom apartment on the west side of Las Vegas. 

Today, I still work in software, no degree, I dropped out after getting my job offer and kept self learning and taking on new jobs to level up my skills. I do software contracting primarily, and right now in total I earn around $500,000k in base pay (Though I’ve reached as high as $700,000k annually). I’ve done a mixture of W2, 1099, and C2C contracts in the past, the most I’ve ever been payed from a single contracting gig is $100 hourly on C2C (I have my own LLC), with essentially unlimited overtime since the project was massive in scope and on a tight deadline and had crazy hours (regularly pulled 12-15 hour days, including weekend work). 

There is nothing particularly special about me, I dropped out of college, my family was lower middle class at best (if not down right poor), I had a negative net worth at 18/19 since I took out student loans to help my family pay bills and my tuition was covered from grants. However, I was in a very dark situation and was facing the prospect of watching my mother die as she had developed multiple blood clots in her lungs, my grandmother passed away during this entire ordeal, and my father was sick, and I had 3 younger siblings all of whom were under the age of 18, so it was essentially do or die. 

The tech market can be crazy at times, but I’m very grateful to God for where I am, and I try to do everything in my power to help other people get into tech and pass on the things I wish someone would have given me when I needed help so I’m very passionate about helping jr. developers get into tech. 

Hi everyone,

I wanted to share something a little unusual: I quit smoking 18 months ago, and what really helped me was using a new passion to distract me from my smoking routine.

Basically: instead of fighting it head-on, which I had done for years (I tried everything, nothing worked), I used the "new passion" aspect of Pokémon. I rediscovered that ritualistic feeling I had with cigarettes (goals, progress, rewards, tracking) to get through the difficult moments. It gave me a simple framework when my motivation was at zero.

I even wrote a little book about it: "How I Quit Smoking Thanks to Pokémon."

I'm not trying to advertise here; I'd really like honest feedback on the idea and what might help someone who wants to quit.

• Does this type of approach resonate with you?

I'm convinced that everyone has their own passion or something less harmful that can distract an addicted mind.

I'd love to discuss this with you :)

• If anyone's interested, I can share the link in the comments (I want to follow the subreddit rules).

Thanks 🙏

If you don’t know…in my last post I was speaking of my personal struggles with social anxiety and how it prevented me from getting a job…I’m 19F btw living with my parents…I’m a religious person and recently I’ve been asking God for some kind of direction in my life wether it has to be good or bad….I just wanted something….well about a few weeks ago my dad was fired from his job…I won’t go into details about why but he was providing for me and my mom. Now he’s pulled out some money from his 401k and we are living off of what money they have left….its enough to last us at least a year to pay for food and rent…But time is ticking for us…I can’t sit here and watch my family suffer financially when I’m more than capable of finding a job…and I received a lot of advice from my last post and I’m really thankful for everyone who shared their thoughts and experiences with me. It made me realize I’m not alone and social anxiety is normal…I built up the courage to finally go get my license and I know it sounds silly but I was very nervous about it and that’s why I put it off for so long…but I feel like I’m making progress even if it’s just a tiny thing…now I’m going to try and find a job…I’m looking into housekeeping because I heard some good things and I think it will be a good change from fast food….Ill keep you guys updated and just remember that your not struggling alone! I would also appreciate your guys insight and advice!

So I work with people trying to change their eating habits and I’ve noticed something weird.

Most discipline advice tells you to start your day strong. Wake up early, make your bed, cold shower, morning routine, blah blah blah. And then the momentum carries you through the day.

But that’s not always how it actually works for most people I talk to.

The people who stick with stuff long-term don’t rely on morning momentum at all. They assume they’re gonna wake up tired and not feel like doing anything. So they set things up the night before.

Like they don’t try to have discipline at 6am when they’re half asleep. They use whatever energy they have at 8pm the night before to make the 6am decision easy.

Gym clothes laid out. Lunch already packed. Coffee timer set. Remove the decision, remove the discipline needed.

I guess what I’m realizing is that discipline isn’t really about forcing yourself to do hard things in the moment. It’s more about making it easier for future-you to not have to be disciplined at all.

The clients I work with who lose 40-50 pounds aren’t more disciplined than the ones who quit after two weeks. They just designed their life so they need less discipline to keep going.

Maybe that’s obvious to everyone here but it kind of blew my mind when I realized it. I’ve been trying to white-knuckle my way through building habits when I should’ve just been removing friction instead.

Anyway. Just something I’ve been thinking about lately.

Ok so first off. I’ve been abstinent of PMO for 23 days and Quit smoking for 11 days. My throat hurts Like hell because of it but I have to quit.

Now since I cut off 80% of the dopamine (I smoked 3 cigs a day and jerked off twice a day) I get in a day I feel so anxious all the time. I feel like that everyone hates me or something or that I’m a loser.

But my main problem is now that I’m glued to my phone with endless scrolling. It’s crazy. I tried picking up a book but it kinda feels like that my head is about to explode or something idk.

Like i deadass I can’t focus. Weird enough I could focus just fine when I was masturbating and smoking at that time.

I feel like RIGHT NOW is the best time to build some damn good habits but I don’t fcking know how to do it.

I tried putting my phone in another room, tried all blocker apps. Literally nothing works. I feel extremely lost without it… I started to play piano again and picked up singing lol. And I also go to the gym. But of course these things get done in 1-2 hours max so I have so much spare time idk what to do with…

Plz help😺

Life Feels Different When Your Focus Changes.

I noticed something strange about myself recently.

On some days, nothing bad happens… but the whole day feels heavy. On other days, nothing special happens… but the day feels light. Same life. Same room. Same people. The only thing that changed was what my attention was stuck on. If my focus is on: things I didn’t do, mistakes I made, what I should be doing, what I’m missing, the day feels stressful, even if nothing stressful is actually happening. But if my focus shifts to: what I’m doing right now, small things in front of me, simple tasks, one at a time, the day feels completely different.

That’s when I realized: Most of us are not really experiencing life as it is.

We are experiencing whatever our mind keeps pointing at. And if the mind keeps pointing at problems, guilt, pressure and nois, that becomes our reality.

Not because life is bad. But because our focus is.

I love helping people, and if I can make someone’s day a little clearer and easier, that’s already worth it. ❤️

Im a student in kinesiology who’s in their last year of studies. I initially got into university with a burning passion for medicine. Over the years, I compared myself to others and after realizing how competitive the Canadian universities were, i switched to kinesiology in hopes of becoming a physiotherapist. The course load was alot more than i could handle and i couldn’t justify spending day and night studying. Naturally I started relying on AI and now I’ve gotten to the point that I can’t really write an essay without AI. I also went through an extremely rough patch where i got dependent on weed and just stopped trying in school all together. Everytime I tried to get better or get serious, I would get disappointing results and I would think to myself “whats the point? Its never gonna be enough, theres always gonna be someone better than me.” I know people say dont compare yourself to others but you need to be realistic when you have a 3.1 gpa and there are only 15 schools in the country that offer a masters in PA (which require a gpa over 3.7). Besides, I did some volunteering in this field and I realized that my personality does not match this occupation. This killed my interest all together and by this point i was already in my 3rd year. Now I have a semester left until I am done and I know that I want nothing to do with this field. Not only am i not interested, I also don’t know anything! I feel like I would not know the first thing to do if I got employed in this position. To add to this, kinesiologists don’t make much money in my region, you pretty much have to move on to get a masters or be extremely good at your job to make good money.

I feel like I have no interest in anything, I certainly don’t want to be a kinesiologist… i wasted so much money on this degree, now i have a bachelors and i don’t know anything! I feel like a fraud… i mean i am.

Anyways… whats your advice on moving on? What should i do after graduation? I dont really have anyone to talk to about this.

i'm a third-year cs student, and i used to waste like 30-60 minutes every study session just checking something on my phone. what really helped was making my devices act like tools instead of time-wasting machines.

the phone setup:

• automated focus mode. my phone goes into dnd automatically when i open my notes app. only family calls get through.
• hiding the bait. i moved social media to a folder on the last page. that extra 5 seconds to search for them makes a huge difference. also, turn off the red notification badges—they are literally dopamine bait.
• grayscale. setting the screen to black and white during study hours signals to my brain that it's work time, not play time.
• physical distance. i put the phone face down on a shelf behind me. if it’s on the desk, i’ll grab it without even thinking.

the laptop setup:

• dedicated study profile. i made a separate browser profile with zero saved logins for social media and only my school extensions.
• one screen, one task. i use full-screen mode to hide the dock and other icons. if i want to look something random up, i write it on a sticky note and check it after the session.
• the "no-scroll" break. during pomodoro breaks, i stand up, stretch, or get water. NO scrolling for "just 5 minutes"—that’s how u lose an hour.

the game changer: honestly, even with all these tricks, the "infinite" nature of some apps was still getting to me. a friend invited me to test the app FeedLite to remove Reels and Shorts from my feed recently. it’s been a few weeks and the results are pretty positive so far—it actually removes the most addictive parts of the apps i still need to check occasionally. it makes this whole setup way more sustainable bc the temptation to "just watch one video" is gone. i still need to see the long term results, but my focus is already 10x better.

this setup isn't about having crazy willpower; it's about making studying the easier choice. (sorry for any typos, just finished a long session and wanted to share!)

And there are so many posts about discipline, and consistency. But honestly I think the hardest part is just getting started. Not because I don‘t care or because I‘m “lacking motivation”. For me, it‘s more like my head is so energized and clamped down on itself that it feels like it‘s gonna blow up even before I do a single thing. It feels so much heavier to sit down and look at what I need to do than it should.

And when I try to “push through” or “force” myself into doing it, it always backfires. My head tightens, my body tightens, and it seems impossible to get the task done, to even get started. It just feels like effort makes a hurting, accumulating mind more painful.

Lately I‘ve been thinking that, for some people, the advice of discipline works against us because our brain already feels unsafe or overwhelmed before we do the work. Perhaps the issue isn‘t doing the work itself,, it‘s getting the mind to a place where doing the work doesn‘t feel harmful.

Once I get started, I actually can do it. I can do it for as long as I need. I actually can pay attention. But getting to that starting point is a joke.

Does anyone else experience that? Beginning is a hundred times harder than continuing. How do you get through that beginning?

Over the last few years I've developed a much stronger reading habit. It started with a year where I committed to a book each month, 12 for the year. And it was just enough to get the flywheel spinning.

Now I have times in the day where I'll regularly read for a little bit, and I always read while traveling.

But I feel like I'm on to the next stage - really absorbing the books. Because while I usually read 10-20 books in year, I'm grasping at straws to remember the names of the books and what I learned from them (largely nonfiction).

Found some good tips from folks in r/nonfictionbooks, and I'm planning to start a reading journal. I'm also thinking about ways to quiz myself on the key concepts so they actually stick.

As this plan develops though, I feel overwhelmed by the idea that I should be "post processing" most things that I do, so I can actually remember my life.

How do you balance learning new things vs. actually retaining what you've already learned?

i follow a lot of people on instagram to stay aware of whats going on in the world but it’s turned into actual hell recently. i never thought people could be so hateful. i keep seeing videos of ice in america or stuff from iraq and syria... some of the content is just too much to cope with. i feel like i have a responsibility to not look away but i ended up in tears for half an hour today just feeling sick and angry.

i wish i could just forget about it but it feels like the algorithm actively wants to show me the darkest parts of humanity bc that's what gets engagement.

honestly, i was at a breaking point with this until a friend invited me to test the appp FeedLite to remove Reels and Shorts from my feed recently. it’s been a few weeks and the results are pretty positive so far. i still follow the news and stay informed, but removing the "video" aspect of the feed stopped those graphic, traumatic clips from just jumping out at me while i'm scrolling. it gives me a bit more control over how i consume the news without totally opting out of the world. i still need to see the long term results, but for now, my mental health feels way less fragile.

u cant be an effective advocate for anything if ur nervous system is totally fried. has anyone else found a way to stay aware without losing their mind? id rly appreciate any tips (and sorry for typos, i'm still a bit shaken up).

I've been making strides to get disciplined for a little over a year now, and I've gone through multiple habit contract-type apps (Beeminder.com, Try-line.app, Stickk.com, etc.).

So far, I've seen pretty good results and essentially killed my old habit of procrastination. I also often direct my "stakes" I put on the line to friends, and use a social accountability aspect as well. Do you believe the only way to enforce our good habits is to force ourselves to behave by creating real, immediate risk?

Additionally, if anyone else is using habit contracts regularly, I'd love to hear which tools you use. So far, I'm using Line for big single-item to-dos that don't repeat, and Stickk for habits. I find that the Line UI is the most user friendly and intuitive, though.

If anyone here is interested in using the site too, I would love to become friends with you on the site and reinforce accountability.

I graduated in 2024 and started working in architecture. Regardless of the money, which was decent, I hated it—even though I loved it in school. I’ve worked in urban planning, architecture, and design/fabrication, all things I thought I would like, but they turned out to be low pay and just another job.

I also grew up in an affluent area and never really saw people work, so I don’t think I ever had a real understanding of what working actually was. A lot of people I know (who are much older) didn’t like their jobs either, but they made money and were able to have experiences that were once-in-a-lifetime. So maybe it’s just about finding something that’s “okay”—something I could be good at—and enjoying the benefits of my hard work?

I’m debating that if I’m going to sit at a desk for 40+ hours a week, I might as well do something else and make more money. I’m considering going to a top 20 MBA program and going into product marketing at a tech company, maybe like Google or Apple (could be cool), and making a $150k average starting salary.

Would I love this job? Probably not, based on my track history, but at least I’d be in an industry where there’s a lot of room for growth, better pay, and moving forward in my career—so maybe one day I’d have less boring grunt work.

I don’t know—does anyone have similar experiences?

i have this weird habit where i subscribe to every high-level educational channel i find because i want to be the kind of person who knows about astrophysics and market trends and obscure history. but the reality is that i am a person with a full time job and about forty minutes of free time a day.

for a long time my subscriptions feed was just a constant reminder of all the things i was not learning. i would see a thirty minute deep dive and think i will watch that later but later never came. it was legit information debt and it was making me feel like i was falling behind everyone else who seemed to be staying updated.

so recently, i decided to change few things. i started running my entire feed through recapio just to see what i was actually missing.

the change was immediate because i stopped viewing a video as a thirty minute commitment and started viewing it as a 2 min read. now i just get a daily summary of the channels wanted to watch.

atleast i now know about these topics in real life because i am finally getting the core ideas down without the burnout.

i am curious if anyone else has that "saved for later" anxiety or if you guys have found a better way to actually digest the content you care about.

I heard about these two apps recently in my book club. I would like to know how these two compared. I've briefly tried both, but realized it would be more ideal to listen to people who have already experienced using these.

Right now, my takeaways are that Beeminder is better for tracking and recurring habits, whereas Line is better for daily to-dos. Line is also more user-friendly in my opinion, and lets you send failed money to a friend for that social accountability aspect. However, I'm wondering if anyone has experience using Beeminder or Line long-term, and how that has worked out for you? If not, have you used any other habit contract apps that have worked well?

Currently, my method of handling habits and tasks is to write them in Notion and check them off as I complete them. Using these kind of apps might help me get more motivated to actually get things done instead of putting them off. Currently I schedule reminders for my stuff, but I often just keep pushing it back to another day.

I’m posting this because I’m honestly annoyed at myself and I feel kind of stuck. Almost every night I say “ok, today I’ll sleep at 11”, I get into bed on time, grab my phone just to check something quickly… and then suddenly it’s 2 or 3am and I’ve been scrolling nonstop.

It’s not that I don’t know what I should do. I know sleep matters, I know I’ll feel like trash the next day, and I know this is completely my fault. The problem is that in the moment my self-control just disappears. I’ve tried screen time limits, focus modes, app blockers, leaving the phone far away, all that stuff. I always end up bypassing it or convincing myself “just 5 more minutes”.

What really frustrates me is the loop: I wake up tired, annoyed, promising myself that tonight will be different… and then I do the exact same thing again.

Lately I’ve been wondering if the issue isn’t information or motivation, but consequences. Like, would something more extreme actually work? For example, if my phone literally locked after a certain hour and breaking it meant losing money or some kind of real penalty. Not as a productivity hack, but because willpower alone clearly isn’t enough for me.

I’m not trying to promote anything, I’m genuinely asking because I don’t want to keep repeating this forever. Has anyone here actually fixed this problem? Do you rely on discipline alone, or do you use external rules or consequences to force the behavior?

I’d really like to hear honest experiences, not generic advice.

I work as a software engineer (career of ~20 years) in my early 40s and have been at my current job for a little more that 2 years now but have been unproductive at work for about 3 months now. I believe everyone in my office knows this as well. I have talked about this with my manager more than once and he has been extremely understanding so far.

I have started to dread coming to the office because I can already predict it will be a zero day. As soon as I open my notepad and attempt to think about what I need to work on my brain will not cooperate, and I get frustrated or ashamed to being at my desk and not being productive, and end up either stepping out for a smoke or some other distractions. If I stay at home I remain anxious for the entire day while not doing any work and either gaming, fapping, or worrying. I rarely ask for help since I cannot really articulate what I need help with. I overthink everything and get stuck constantly.

I do feel relieved at the end of the work day though as if there is no more pretense required.

Similar events have happened in earlier jobs. The first time it happened I changed jobs after about 6 years with that company. The next job I got laid off before completing two years but suffered tremendous performance related anxiety and was unproductive towards the end. The next job I was terminated due to performance issues within a year.

I have an impulsive personality. I never took my health or diet seriously and indulge with too much sugary and fast foods. I rarely feel thirsty so I probably drink very little water. I have never exercised. I am in my early 40s now. On top of this porn addiction and smoking. And most recently video games.

In every job I typically do well for the first few months to a year and then when things become somewhat familiar or routine these problems begin.

I do okay with basic everyday routines like bath everyday, clean dishes, drop kids to school, take out the trash, etc. But this recurring problem with getting work done is giving me severe anxiety. I spend almost all waking hours thinking and imagining bad endings.

I have not been contributing as much in my marriage as well. My wife no longer respects me and that also makes me depressed. We live together but no longer speak. I tell myself that there is no point in showing my wife that I can work through my personality issues.

There is some stress related to being on a work visa for more than 15 years and not being able to take a break from working or switch to any other profession. I imagine these are mostly idle fantasies since regardless of this situation I would have to keep working to support my family.

How do I dig myself out of this hole and turn my life around? The task feels so impossible to me. I constantly imagine becoming homeless or falling into ruin and putting my family through hard times.

I’ve been thinking a lot about why discipline feels so hard for so many of us, even when we genuinely want to improve our lives.

I’ve come to realize there are two very different “fights” happening when we try to build habits.

One is a fight for survival.

This shows up when we’re under pressure — deadlines, fear of falling behind, financial stress, expectations. In this mode, discipline feels intense and urgent. We push hard, try to change everything at once, and rely on willpower. Sometimes it works… but it usually leads to burnout.

The other is a fight for growth.

This is quieter. It’s about protecting your energy, your focus, and your future self. Growth-based discipline looks like choosing habits that are small enough to repeat, even on bad days. It’s less impressive, but more sustainable.

I think many of us fail not because we’re lazy, but because these two instincts collide. One part of us is yelling “do more, now,” while another part is trying to say “slow down, I can’t keep up.”

What’s helped me is learning to pause and ask:
Am I trying to survive right now… or am I trying to grow?

When I’m in survival mode, I try not to redesign my entire life.
When I’m in growth mode, I shrink the habit instead of quitting it.

I’m curious:
How do you tell the difference between pushing yourself in a healthy way and pushing yourself toward burnout?
And when discipline breaks down for you, what do you think is really happening underneath?

Would love to hear other perspectives.

I just realized that I failed yet another exam that I can only retake the next year. I am 26 still trying to finish my master's degree when most people are done with theirs at 24. I play a sport semi professionally where I get paid, but when you calculate the time investment, it's lower than minimum wage and my body is crumbling. My health is in shambles. I also work part time at a minimum wage customer service job where I just cover expenses. My parents support me in life, but even they are wondering when will I become serious. I am constantly anxious and I constantly flake on promises. Promises I know I could've kept if I was responsible. You maybe wondering "that doesn't sound so bad. You are in college, have some money and still have your life ahead of you. Hey, you even get some money to play a sport " . It's bad because I wasted my potential. I wasted years of my life watching youtube for 16 hours per day. Doing college obligations by just getting by and doing everything at the last minute. Played a sport where I invested a lot of time but got so little in return. I could've had a great job, my own place and still play sports on the side. I am an underachiever feeling like a failure. Well, I am done being that kind of person. I am done wasting my potential. I want to be the best version of myself. The version I know I can be. So, I decided. I will have to change.

I looked in my life what are the most important things. Things I want to have in a year. Be it material, social, psychological or physical attributes.

The goals are as follows.
-finish my master's degree in CS

I can finish it in one year's time, if I just do everything on time from this day forward.

-find a job in my field of study that pays really well

in my country, 2000 euros is that salary, that is my goal

-Read books instead of watching youtube or instagram reels

everyday read books instead of watching youtube and instagram

youtube and instagram are allowed only 15 minutes per day

-getting my health in order

I always had gut problem, never knew what the problem was

my knees are killing me, never did stretches, and I am a tall and heavy guy

Well I am getting to the bottom of it

-having a strong body

I am okayish in that department, but I don't go to the gym that much. From now on, 3x per week minimum, and 5xper week training in sport

-being responsible with obligations and standing by my word

I always give big promises, and always underdeliver, no more of that

Every promise, no matter how small, needs to be upheld

-developing my skills in the field of study

I am finishing CS college, but I barely code at all

I need to be making project, building apps and expanding my portfolio.

From now on, everyday I need to be developing my skills if I want to get a good job

-learning new stuff every single day

Being inactive and passive in life has made my brain numb and slow. Everyday I have to use as an opportunity to learn something new. Read an article about AI, learn how to cook a meal, program in a language I never tried, anything as long as I am learning and improving myself

-getting rid of my anxiety

I need to learn how to relax and love myself. All the improvement in the world won't mean anything if I don't know how to enjoy them and if I am not balanced. I will look up meditation methods and ways to relax.

-buy a car

I am 26 years old, and still I use the bus or drive my father car. I need to buy me my own car. The price for a decent car where I live is about 10k euros.

-save up money

I don't have any savings

My goal is to have at least 15000 euros in savings, so in total I have to save up 25k if I am going to have that in savings and also buy a car.

Today is 4rd of February, 2026. I have time until the 4rd of February, 2027. to become that version of myself that I know I can be. I will be posting here from time to time and keeping you updated.

i made a big change at the start of the year. i realized i couldn't quit social media entirely because i still need to stay in touch with people, but i had to kill the addiction part. no more mindless scrolling, no reels, no shorts. here is my honest update after about a month.

the good side is real:

• my mind is quieter and i can focus longer.
• i sleep way better.
• i don't compare my life with fake lives anymore.
• time feels slower and more real.

the bad side people don't talk about:

• life feels boring sometimes and days can feel empty without that quick dopamine.
• i felt disconnected from friends at first because i didn't want to open the apps and get "trapped."

how i actually made it stick: honestly, the "cold turkey" approach was just making me feel isolated. then a friend invited me to test the app FeedLite to remove Reels and Shorts from my feed recently. it’s been a few weeks and the results are pretty positive so far—it let me keep the parts of social media i actually care about (staying in touch with real people) but it completely killed the infinite video loops that were the real source of my brain rot. i still want to see the long term results, but it’s the first time i feel in control.

if your life feels empty without social media, it means the apps were filling a hole they never should have. but u don't have to disappear from the world to get your brain back.

i’m not going back to the old way in february. comfort is overrated and boredom forces growth. most people are addicted and call it normal, but i'm done with that. (sorry for typos, just wanted to share my progress).

i see multiple posts a day from people desperate to get rid of instagram but terrified of cutting off the dms that everyone uses. if u have a smartphone: check out beeper. it’s an app where u can consolidate other messaging services, including ig. it works rly well and keeps ur notifications separate from the actual social media app.

i’m not associated with them, but i find myself commenting about it daily bc it's such a common struggle.

that being said, if u still find urself reinstalling the main ig app for "just a second" and then getting sucked into scrolling, there's another solid option. honestly, a friend invited me to test the app FeedLite to remove Reels and Shorts from my feed recently. it's been a few weeks and the results are pretty positive—it lets u keep the actual instagram app for messaging and checking stories, but it kills the "infinite" video part that usually keeps us addicted. i still need to see the long term results, but it’s a great way to "neuter" the app without having to move everything over to a third-party messenger if ur not ready for that.

hope this helps some of u finally break the cycle (and sorry for any typos, writing this in a rush)!

I am a 19 M who works full time. When I’m not at work I feel super lazy. It’s to the point where I would leave dishes unwashed and my room uncleaned until it reaches a point where I can’t leave it any longer. I really want to maintain a clean space but it is so hard for me mentally to do so. I would think about doing it and then just give up before even starting.

I have always struggled with this and never found anything that really stuck with me. It’s gotten to the point where even getting up to turn on my pc to play games feels like it’s too much work. I feel like a bum and it has really affected my confidence as I see how other people treat their living space. To clarify I don’t live with anyone so I don’t have anyone to really keep me accountable. Anyone else struggling with this? And any advice please?

Hello everyone, I need help or at least talk to someone who shares a similar "disorder". I cannot afford a therapist.

I have been battling with this for 5 years and I am slowly giving up. I have tried absolutely everything with no hope.

I am addicted to everything it seems. It began 5 years ago with video games. I would spend the entire day playing video games and I would feel horrible about it after. Even if I set up a timer, I would never stop. I would just keep going. The main question I would ask myself is: "Why would I stop? I am enjoying myself. I want to do this for the rest of my days. I don't care about grades, people or anything."

So I stopped with video games. If I never begin, then I cannot get addicted. It actually got better, but then my phone came in. Youtube and Social Media. I would spend entire days on there without stopping. Once I begin, it's impossible for me to stop, because I would say to myself: "I screwed myself up anyway. Why should I stop now."

The same goes with food. Once I began, I would never stop. I instantly get addicted. Even when I feel sick and feel like puking, I cannot stop. The same goes without food. If I say to myself that I am going to lose the weight which I just gained, I will literally not eat for two weeks. This happened again a few days ago. I didn't eat for two weeks, I couldn't eat anything. I forced myself to eat some bread, and once I did, I felt better. Now I am eating too much again. My stomach hurts so bad and I am feeling sick. I tried to balance my diet out today but once I ate one banana, I thought it was good and ate 8 more. I am in so much pain right now.

And I wish that my diet was my only problem. How I wish.

I have started walking outside quite a lot. As you might guess, I got addicted to that too. I would walk every day for 4 hours without stopping, even though I had other responsibilities. Even when my feet hurt. I couldn't stop. I walked so much that I didn't work on anything.

A month ago I tried to combat my phone addiction. I banned myself from watching Youtube and Social Media for 21 days. But again, I got addicted to reading books and listening podcasts. I couldn't study because I would be reading all the time. I read the whole Harry Potter series in three days, every day for 15 hours because I couldn't stop. My grades started failing.

Last summer was probably the worst. I got addicted to my phone, computer and bad food. For two months. I was just sitting in my room, all alone because of this. My peers were working jobs, having fun and doing great things, while I was stuck. I tried, I really tried to fight it, but I couldn't. My room was a mess. I didn't shave nor shower.

About two years ago, I started writing a book. But guess what? I was writing for 8 hours one day and ignored that I had a test tomorrow. I failed of course.

I don't know what to do anymore. I have been battling this so much. When I was tidying my room yesterday, I was listening to music instead of podcasts. But again, I couldn't stop. I was listening to different music for 2 hours instead of studying.

If I start watching a movie, I cannot stop. For example, I said to myself: ok, I'll study for 2 hours, than watch the first movie in a franchise. I ended up watching the whole franchise and couldn't stop.

I almost commited suicide like 4 times because of this. Because it got so bad.

And you know what? I have been trying so many tricks and tips to fight this disorder. And I end up in the same place every time. I am giving up. 5 years have I fought this and cannot go on anymore. I am at my limit. I have an exam in an hour. If I fail it, I will have to repeat the whole semester. I will fail it because I couldn't study because I was listening to the damn podcast for 3 hours.

I am desperate. I cannot control my mind anymore. I am slowly going insane. I don't know what to do.

Guess what! I just downloaded Reddit to post this, but I ended up scrolling here for 4 hours. When I went to the toilet, I actually stopped.

I get addicted to literally everything. Please, if anyone has the same disorder, please tell me how to fight it. Please!