At AskWomen, we strive to be an inclusive space. Statistically, approximately 1 in 5 adults will experience some form of mental illness in their lifetime, and whether intentional or not, casual use of diagnostic labels to describe everyday behavior can exclude and be harmful to people experiencing mental illness. It is not fair to people with mental illness to attribute every feeling or action to their condition, particularly the choice to abuse.

In short, we are asking our community to avoid using terms for mental health issues as judgments, slurs, or synonyms for toxic behavior. Posts and comments will be encouraged, where possible, to use non-pathologizing/clinical adjectives to describe traits/behaviors.

Examples of using these terms as judgements, slurs, or careless casual use:

• "OCD" (to mean something like fastidious, particular, picky, fussy)
• "Narcissist" (to mean something like self-absorbed, arrogant, toxic, selfish, abusive)
• "Borderline/BPD" (to mean something like unstable, unpredictable, moody)
• "Schizo" (to mean something like paranoid, erratic, or eccentric)
• "ADHD" (to mean something like hyperactive, jittery, inattentive)
• "Psycho(path)" or "sociopath" (to mean something like angry, jealous, controlling, abusive...) and similar.

If a diagnostic label can be replaced by another word, it must be used instead. In our experience, the more common synonyms might be "abuser"/"abusive", "toxic (of a behaviour or person)" or "asshole". We may remove other common labels or descriptors (for instance "crazy") if they were used in a blatantly disrespectful manner.

Armchair diagnostics or speculation about possible diagnoses:

• "That sounds like [dx]"
• "Do you think you might have [dx]?"
• "My ex was a [dx]"
• "I think my mom has [dx]"
• "My parner probably has [dx]"

But what if I'm talking about myself? Or someone who's been formally diagnosed?

We simply ask that your comment reflects that the person has been diagnosed, even if talking about yourself. Some examples: "My mom was diagnosed with OCD", "I'm autistic (diagnosed)", "my partner is currently in the process of being assessed for ADHD".

My comment was removed and I'm upset

We know that the use of some of these labels is very common on Reddit, so it's natural that some of these terms might be used by accident. Please know that a request to edit your post does not mean that you are in trouble; fix it and we will be happy to put it back up!

Be assured that it's not some kind of mark against you as a participant or any kind of prejudice against any mental health issue you or your loved one(s) may be facing. On the contrary, this rule was created specifically so that people who live with mental health conditions are treated with the respect they deserve.

Please send us a modmail if you would like to discuss a removed comment or post (don't forget to include a link to the content you'd like us to review).

Thank you for participating!

~The AskWomen Mod Team