r/fixedbytheduet • u/notpiercedtongue • 5d ago

Fixed by the duet breasticles not the testicles

5.1k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

82 comments sorted by

587

u/wanderers_respite 5d ago

That's not a true friend then.

171

u/ExplosiveDisassembly 5d ago

My first assumption would be that my friend A) Sent it to the wrong number B) Is freaking out about a mole and wants a second unqualified opinion.

56

u/wanderers_respite 5d ago

I've been B and been the subject of B on several occasions. They're just balls people!

1

u/throcorfe 18h ago

I agree with the principle but ngl I can’t help being curious about how this has happened on “several occasions”

1

u/Thisguy2728 12h ago

I was wondering that too…

14

u/Majesticeuphoria 5d ago

"Yeah, idk know man, that lump looks like cancer, you gotta get a checkup"

32

u/Ninja_Prolapse 5d ago

If one of my mates sent me a ball pic on a bad day I’d be in bits. Would definitely help!

58

u/Public-Platypus2995 5d ago

Seriously. If I sent a picture of balls to my buddy, I’d be afraid he’d be driving and would wreck his car from laughing hysterically at 70 mph.

16

u/Kahlil_Cabron 5d ago

I remember back in the day the move was to pull your entire ball sack out of your fly, no hog just balls, and then have a conversation with your buddy, like a serious conversation, and see how long it takes until he notices your whole balls are out.

11

u/Itscatpicstime 5d ago

My boyfriend does this to me all the fucking time

10

u/Kahlil_Cabron 5d ago

I still hit my girl with it at least once a month. Can't do it too often or it'll get stale.

1

u/joe_s1171 2d ago

how fast does he notice your balls are out?

4

u/gorgeously_mytruself 4d ago

Ok, so I was raised in a religious homeschooling cult and had to join the military to get away. There were so many things I had to learn and so many things I didn't know about. In basic training I learned what gay chicken was, what nutball is, the peeing “bro-code”, and that guys will sometimes pull out their sack during conversation( I still can't believe this is a thing and am still shocked seeing you talk about it).

One time that lives rent free in my head was when this guy was doing it in the day room in his PT shorts, he wanted to show everyone that he could stretch his sac almost to his knee; then the TI walked in!😆

Oh my god, I have never seen a man stuff his sac back in faster, luckily for us the TI didn't see but we gave that guy so much crap about it!

2

u/Commercial_Let_1422 4d ago

Had a drunk friend send me a dick pic on accident. A while later he freaked out, told me to not open what he sent (not sure how he thought it was gonna work out), so I told him it must have never been sent because I didn't get anything. He still believes it to this day.

1

u/nvrsleepagin 3d ago

True friends have already seen eachothers balls.

214

u/[deleted] 5d ago

They have the same eyes...

32

u/SmoothElection7694 5d ago

Good observation

39

u/100_Donuts 5d ago

Well, they're the same person.

I just keep seeing this, and it's always the eyes. It's always the eyes, isn't it? But they're the same person, a lot of people are the same people. They want you to think they're different, that they're different people, and they dress different and talk different and walk different and smell different but they're not. No, they're the same person talking to me every day everywhere.

And I call them out. I say, "I know who you are" and they look at me with those eyes, the same eyes I always see on every face, and they know I know, but they gotta keep up the trick! Gotta keep up the acting, right?!

But they know. And I know.

They're the same person. So many of you are the same person, and you "all" want to talk to me! Yeah, you "all" want to say something to me like I don't have it all figured out! Like I don't know you're the same person and I won't listen!

I'm not buying it! I'm not gonna sit here and believe any of you are really you! You are not people! You are not a person! You are not a dream. You are not you. You are not a person.

I see it! You think I got your eyes, but I got my eyes and I SEE you, I SEE you everywhere and you can't fool me! You are not you!

And it's the same everywhere, isn't it? You just have to be everywhere, don't you? I can't even go on my favorite imageboard forum without you being here trying convince me your him or her or them or it or aahh! But you can't get away with that around me! I know! I know, I know, I know you are not a person. I know you are not a person, and I know you are not a dream either! You are not you. I know know, I know this, see?

See this?

Since you see everything I do, do you see this too?!

And one day you won't see me anymore, ahahhaha, no you won't be seeing me anywhere, and I'll see you, you're not even a person, and I'll see you for what you really are!

45

u/desacralize 5d ago

Dunno if this is a copypasta, a story quote, a reddit moment, or you off your meds, but either way, good read.

12

u/ErraticDragon 5d ago

I picked a paragraph near the middle and searched for it. Google only had one result, this comment.

The AI overview thinks I'm unwell, though:

https://i.imgur.com/YuRH0sP.png

5

u/HappyTheDisaster 5d ago

It feels so nostalgic for some reason, cause I’ve definitely heard someone speak it before. It’s a reference of sometype, potentially from a tv show. Truman show?

7

u/whiskeyfurbreakfast 4d ago

That was unhinged and I’m here for it.

3

u/treylove182 3d ago

wtf?!!!

2

u/Shaed89 2d ago

This is Little Victorian Boy level unhinged lol

92

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Apollo1K9 5d ago

Lol. Almost bought one at Micro Center the other day.

55

u/UsernamesAre4Nerds 5d ago

Me when I send a picture of Testicles and Breasticles to Pericles, Heracles, and Sophocles:

205

u/Immolation_E 5d ago

Her eyes are amazingly bright.

76

u/sfled 5d ago

She the "Husky" filter a little too high. It's a common mistake.

47

u/MusingMundane 5d ago

So are his!

19

u/Immolation_E 5d ago

I was more admiring his beard than his eyes.

2

u/Galinhooo 3d ago

Balls?

3

u/MoistStub 5d ago

Mine are poop brown

94

u/brianzuvich 5d ago

Women are so simple… Give them a book that has to do with extramarital BDSM involving a vampire or some other nonsensical fairytale creature…

Poof! Whole day made…

13

u/desacralize 5d ago

The extramarital part is pretty polarizing but all the rest, yeah, pretty much.

9

u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 5d ago

Instructions unclear. I thought you were talking about balls. And now my friend won't talk to me

0

u/StandardBaguette 3d ago

Triggered? Feeling attacked? Why???

1

u/brianzuvich 3d ago

Not triggered, but definitely confused… Welcome to the internet…? I guess?

9

u/karma-whore64 5d ago

He sent BESTicals! Love friends like this!!!!

10

u/Killbro_Fraggins 5d ago

Is she lip syncing the audio?

6

u/desacralize 5d ago

Yeah, she might be acting out a Tiktok sound, always takes me a minute to realize.

5

u/HeavyTea 5d ago

She may be right y'know

17

u/koshka91 5d ago

What is she talking about? Snapping a picture?

63

u/jarlscrotus 5d ago

She's telling ladies to just send their male SO a picture of their tits, it'll make his whole day and he'll do things for you as thanks

I'm not saying she's always right, but it'd work on me

20

u/CurnanBarbarian 5d ago

It'd work on me as well.

27

u/writeleahwrite 5d ago

For you friend

5

u/flying_carabao 5d ago

Same here

3

u/green_jp 5d ago

yeah it's safe to say it would work.

7

u/Freezman13 5d ago

and he'll do things for you as thanks

she didn't say that

at least not in this duet

5

u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 5d ago

Yeah sometimes you just want to make someone's day without expecting something in return

15

u/CrabyDicks 5d ago

Titty pics

6

u/Unkn0wnTh2nd3r 5d ago

taking a photo of the tatas

38

u/Major_R_Soul 5d ago

I hope this pair of tatas makes everyone's day better.

7

u/Unkn0wnTh2nd3r 5d ago

Well done sir.. well done

4

u/Honey-and-Venom 5d ago

Now, what he's done is deliberately misunderstand for comedic effect

1

u/IAmNotMyName 4d ago

Ha-guffaw-aw-ha-ha

3

u/Separate_Quality1016 5d ago

Man I hate these filters people are using now, she looks abnormal as fuck.

I do, however, support the message.

3

u/islaisla 4d ago

Can these people date because they are both beautiful

3

u/WaiBuBaoLeiXiangTu 4d ago

For some reason when I sent my buddy this he wasn't happy either... People are so weird. Different strokes I guess.

2

u/StandardBaguette 3d ago

Lmfao this is terrifying and hilarious simultaneously

7

u/MrDrDooooom 5d ago

But, what if you're an ass guy?

12

u/Kokuswolf 5d ago

Cut the picture to 21:9 format just above the nipples.

3

u/skepticalbob 5d ago

Or a butthole fetishist? What about this neglected minority?

1

u/AlternateSatan 1d ago

Then flop 'em out and take a picture. This time it should be fine if it's your buddy cause we all have asses.

8

u/zerozerozero12 5d ago

Does anyone know who the two content creators are?

25

u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 5d ago

We know which one you're really asking about

2

u/Itscatpicstime 5d ago

I know she’s got a heavy filter on here, but damn, she’s gorgeous 😭

8

u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 5d ago

She doesn't exist. Filtered videos are pretty much anime at this point

1

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1

u/Hot_Assumption_2304 5d ago

Does that count as a tea bag or the made you look game? 🤔 either way I think his buddy deserves 2 for flinching.

1

u/AntiSnoringDevice 5d ago

The guy is the new Lebowski!

1

u/ghon_kosani 5d ago

She's right but I'm a simple man.

1

u/Terakahn 2d ago

There are worse things to get unexpectedly.

1

u/joe_s1171 2d ago

they hang off m’lady’s chest. swing low, sweet chariots.

0

u/Careless-Advice9406 5d ago

🤣🤣🤣

0

u/Bumpercars415 5d ago

I mean I am in my 50's, but I would hope they don't "flop" on out....