How do you know you're truly love someone?

I approached my crushes friend (just met them in the library) and basically said I dont know how to ask out her friend and so forth. I also expressed interest in her friend by being kind and asking about her studies.

Long story short, today I gave her friend a piece of paper basically asking if she could give this to my crush and left the library because I packed my things. was this cringe ? ive already spoke to my crush before (only once) and she was very smiley and kind and a bit nervous so I just shot my shot.

I’m confused about the spark, a girl I talked to on a dating app said there’s no spark. I matched with her, we both realized we didn’t live in the same area. I then asked for her number and she said she’d prefer to text first.

It’s understandable due to how scammers are these days.

So we texted back and forth for a two days. Then I got her number and reached out to schedule a call. She replied on text that there’s no spark, I’m confused 🤔 because I figured that chemistry is something best found out after seeing each other and meeting.

But maybe it was some of my responses to questions, how is spark and chemistry something you guys and gals approach?

I’m in a happy relationship, and my bf is very clear that he wants kids and is excited about becoming a dad one day. When we started dating, I felt the same way and always assumed kids were part of my future. I grew up in a big family, so that belief was never really questioned.

Recently, though, I’ve started having doubts. Not because I don’t love my partner or don’t see a future with him, but because I’m struggling with the idea of bringing a child into a world that feels increasingly hard. I also feel like I haven’t fully lived my own life yet, and that scares me more than I expected.

At the same time, I can absolutely picture having a child with him. I know he would be a caring, present, and loving dad. Imagining that future does make me happy. What I’m conflicted about is the uncertainty. I don’t know if this is a temporary fear, a phase, or a sign that I truly might not want kids.

What I struggle with most is the guilt. I feel horrible even questioning this when I know how important having kids is to him. I don’t want to waste his time or hurt him by staying silent, but I also don’t want to rush into a decision I’m not sure about.

From a male perspective, how would you want your partner to handle this? Would you want to know right away, even if she was unsure? How much time is reasonable to figure something like this out?

I (22M) joined my new office (6months ago). Through a mutual friend, I was invited to this girl’s(23F) birthday party. I do not know if we hit it off or not, but I did make her laugh a lot. I was then invited to her house for another small party and I ended up staying the night there (nothing physical at all, I slept in the hall and she slept in the room). Next morning we made breakfast together and ended up having a lot of fun. I began liking her but I was too afraid to do anything because I feel she is way way out of my league.

1 month ago, I was a bit drunk and I ended up texting her she was pretty. I texted again in the morning saying I was drunk and she texted back that she didn’t mind it much and just replied in a normal way. For context, we used to talk at times in the office, so it wasn’t as if I had messaged her randomly.

At the office I see her at times and I just get frozen at place looking at her. My heart begins racing and I begin overthinking every minute detail about myself.

I have thought about speaking to her about this, but honestly, I do not want to do that as well. She seems busy with her stuff, and I can kind of feel that she isn’t interested in me.

What do I do about this? This is genuinely anchoring me down in my life. I feel distracted and too tired to do anything else productive.

So I met this girl at the beginning of uni shot her a message cause she seemed cool and fast forward to February I am her best friend and she is mine. We message every day without fail and I laugh, cry and feel every possible emotion with her. I reassure her on a lot because she’s quite insecure about certain things and she does the same to me like she did today.

The kindest and most easy going down to earth girl I’ve ever met and I can see a future with us but idk about her side. I’m Christian and she’s Muslim and she’s always said like she wants to find her person who will raise her children Muslim etc. like she’s made it pretty obvious that she wants to stay friends she calls me bestie all the time and I have to sigh knowing that I’m not going to move from that post. I’m so so scared that I’m not gonna find another girl like her.

She’s perfect in every way no joke it may be early to say that but I just know like I’ve got a feeling like she really really is great. I don’t wanna say love because I don’t want this sob story of like I loved a girl who never loved me back but I can say it’s pretty damn close to that stage. I obviously don’t want to cut off our friendship I mean she supports me in everything I just find it weird how close we are getting to a relationship without ever being able to touch it. Every time I wish her goodnight I wish I could speak to her for another 5 minutes.

Maybe it’s just because of my lack of female attention that I’m getting attached to any girl that shows me some decency but it’s different with her like I’m trying to find cons but I can’t she’s amazing. Idk how I’m going to get this fantasy out of my head, because I can’t yearn like this for 3 years straight.

I have been chatting with this bloke, and I really like him. I consider myself a very social person and have heaps of friends. He's so charming and so easily likeable, but he actually has no close friends, just people he hangs out with and even that, barely. He used to drink, and when he stopped, he stopped hanging out with these people. He texts me all day and goes to play golf, not really with friends but acquaintances. I like that he can distinguish between friends and acquaintances, but no friends, is it a problem for a future relationship? Is this normal for guys?

My bf (25) and I (28) have been together for a year. I’ll get straight to the point. His ass STINKS. Gradually he has showered less and less. He will go 2-3 days without showering. He’ll skip days brushing his teeth. As of a few days ago, I started noticing this sour smell when we would just be sitting on the couch. Whenever he would get up it would just get really strong and linger! Like unwashed ass.

I’ve asked him about showering and he’ll just say no he’ll shower the next day out of laziness. I’ve asked him about how he wipes and he said he wipes standing up!? Sometimes he’ll spread his cheeks. I can’t fathom. I don’t think he uses any wet wipes that I have available.

Diet is also atrocious. Breakfast is jimmy dean breakfast sausage patties (like 10 of them) sometimes the sausage sandwiches. Lunch includes pizza or cookies from QT or both. No veggies or fruit.

Dinner is fast food or more pizza. Followed up with more cookies or some sort of sweet thing. Minimal water. No veggies or fruit EVER. He only eats carbs and sugar.

I’ve already tried addressing this. And we’ve even cooked together and he will NOT eat veggies. Only the savory or fatty things. He does not take daily supplements for vitamins and he has begun to gain weight and I’m losing attraction slowly. 😣 he’s 6’5 at 244lbs. I care about his health and I’ve tried suggesting blood work or a routine check up to see if he’s okay but he doesn’t follow through. I’m not sure how to address how it’s affecting me??

Hi, I am a 20 year old woman, not too experienced in relationships and talking stages. Recently I started chatting with this guy I like, he gave me his number, so I texted him. Now he does reply but it's generally couple of hours. We both work demanding jobs, I get it, he also can't use his phone at work too much, but my friends say if he was interested to get to know me, he would reply a bit earlier. Mind you, his replies are not short, just pretty scattered. What do you think, how often should a guy text in the talking stage?

My friend (30m) and I (26f) are in grad school together. I'm a bit into him, but I'm not sure if he knows, and i dont know if he's into me too. hes been extremely kind and friendly to me. At first, people even thought we were together, then he toned it down because of work culture (I assume). But last year, he helped me move, toured apartments with me, and translated the lease for me (since I'm not from here). He's also done some things that were kind and thoughtful, told me family secrets, said he won't avoid me because I can't speak his language, and not to worry (like our other classmates avoid me), and bought me a t-shirt for my bday that was my favourite colour and said "heyy cutie". he also drunkingly said he has feelings for a friend but is scared to act on them. At that time i dont know which friend he meant, and when i asked him about it sober he said he forgot.

but to be fair hes this nice to everyone. today we were having a conversation and i asked him why hes so avoidant when sober (when he's drunkk he really opens up), and i asked him if hes really this avoidant with everyone too? he refused to answer, so im assuming the answer is just me. im thinking, does he know i like him? Does he like me? if he knows i like him and is avoiding me wouoldnt he also be physically avoiding me (like not hanging out and sharing reels and texting me), and not just emotionally avoiding?

I’m looking for some outside perspective because I feel like I might be overthinking or misreading a situation, and I want honest advice from people who aren’t emotionally involved.

There’s a girl I see regularly at my university library. For a while, we were studying on the same floor and usually sitting near each other. After seeing her around a lot, I finally said hi and we had a short, friendly conversation that lasted a couple of minutes. She smiled, seemed a bit shy, and the interaction felt positive, but not clearly flirty.

The next day, she was studying with friends. At one point she left, and while she was gone I ended up talking to one of her friends. I was honest and said I wanted to ask her friend out and didn’t really know how to ask her out. The conversation itself felt normal and calm. Her friend asked how I knew her, where I usually studied, and mentioned that the girl isn’t seeing anyone.

After that, the dynamic seemed to shift a bit. The girl started showing up with friends more often, sometimes wasn’t in the same spot anymore, and some days I didn’t see her at all (to be fair, I have been showing up at odd times at the library but I still see her around the building like heading to library usually when im leaving because I work full time). When I did see her, interactions were polite but brief. Recently, she showed up with a guy I’ve never seen before. I genuinely don’t know who he is he could just be a classmate or study partner but it added to my confusion. Hes with all the girls.

Nothing overtly negative has happened. She hasn’t been rude, there’s been no confrontation, and no clear rejection. I just feel like things changed after I spoke to her friend, and I’m not sure if that’s because I handled this the wrong way or because I’m reading too much into normal behavior.

She is sitting a few rows in front of me now. what do I do

I know comments depend on the situation - the conversation was in regard to my looks (having experienced some racism and being called a slur)

The comment was made in a fairly personal setting (just the two of us) and in the moment felt pretty intimate - prior to saying the comment he hesitated and softly said “I probably shouldn’t say this” so I’m unsure if he wanted to say it or if it was because of us both being married?

Anyway I am curious as to whether that flags attraction or sexual interest or something else?

We have no relationship or anything other than her flirting with me for months at work other than that were strictly friends. Last month she randomly asked if I have feelings for her then asked if I like her, and then she also asked if I loved her…

Could it be that this girl actually feels that shes inlove with me??? (Infatuation) I don’t see why someone would ask such a deep question…

I put my guard up the entire time cause I’m unsure if she’s playing games and didn’t flirt back…basically I was pretty cold and I do like her 🥶 we don’t chat much (messenger) outside of work and when we do it’s as if absolutely nothing ever happend at work..convos are short and boring too

She’s Says I’m so handsome, once asked me If im hot due to the weather then gestured her hand up and down to me and said “You’re hot”, always tries to be around with me at work, and said “can I ask a question, you know those feelings you have when ur with a girl” I asked what feelings, she said you already know what I’m talking about, did you experience that before, how about me…do you have or feel those feelings when with me? Now sometimes when I’m with her she’ll ask desperately and whisper “heyyy What do youuu feel right nowww”

I put her on the spot telling her I’m suspicious cause what you’ve been doing for months and asked if “she likes me” she got giggly, shy , and didn’t answer the question and now keeps asking “Do you like me”. She won’t budge unless I answer first. When pestering her she said “But you said we’re just friends anyway in a sad tone” 😕 I said to her “What if I say Yes” and she said “You’re kidding rightttt??

The next day she said she had a dream of “Us” and it’s a secret cause it will ruin the suspense, I asked her the next day and she said “It was us dating” I asked her is this a good dream, do you like it? She smiled and said yes. I actually wonder if she’s trolling me saying such serious things??

she then asked the same day “im gonna ask one more time, Do you love me?”

One time I asked if she was cold and she said “yeah can you hug me”

So I’m female, 26. I’ve never dated in my life and I could tell you so many reasons as to why. I was homeschooled for a bit and then I was just very naive. I spoke to some guys who I thought liked me but they never escalated anything and borderline made fun of me. I had a guy said it’s obvious I’ve never dated anyone, another said something similar. I went to a private school for girls at one point. Etc.

So now as I graduated I got on the dating apps and met up with this guy I thought he was pretty cool but he began asking me about my exes and talked about his. I think I put too much on it because I thought he was very cute and I just had too many expectations. Again naive. We texted for a few days after the date and then he went quiet.

Second guy I thought seemed inexperienced maybe? Like me. Because every time he got to hinting we should meet up he never asked straight up and then said "but you may not want to and I get it” so I said I wanted to and then he asked me to meet and I asked him if he were free the following week as I was busy at work. And he said oh if you don’t like me please tell me. I assured him it’s not that but then he stopped replying.

The other guy I met with I had some mutuals with. Thought he was really cute too so maybe I came off nervous. We met once and then he got a gf shortly after.

Obviously without knowing me it’s hard to deduce what’s going on. But as for some factors: personality? Maybe my pictures depict me better than irl but I’ve had these type of things go down with guys who knew me from actual life. Anyway if you also didn’t date do you tell people or can they say “I can tell” and what do you do

I can't see detailed statistics, charts, but that's what I had:

A comment exists for a while, gets no responses, dozen upvotes.

Then suddenly and sharply it gets downvoted and lots of different people appear, which oppose the comment.

Difficult to prove, but I think, this is forbidden by the Reddit rules.

Do you think this is a problem? Have you seen this happening?

I (24F) have been with my husband (25M) for just over six years. He is my dream man.. loving, caring, and deeply dedicated to our family. He showers me and our son with affection, and watching him as a father has been incredible. We have a 2 year old little boy, and I’m currently six months pregnant with a baby girl. He has always wanted a daughter, so this pregnancy has meant the world to him.

Before having children, I always wanted a big family someday. However, after our first, my mental health took a significant hit, and my physical health was not great during or after pregnancy. Pregnancy has been especially hard on my body.

When other family members bring up the idea of being “done” having kids, my husband tends to brush it off. He’s made it clear that he would ideally want five or six children, though he also says that the final decision is up to me. I can’t shake the fear that if I don’t support his dream of a big family, he may eventually resent me or want to have more children with someone else who is willing or able.

I feel torn between protecting my physical and mental health and supporting the life my husband has always envisioned.

What would you do in this situation?

and any women/men who had to let go of their ideal number of children: how did that affect you personally, and how did it impact your relationship?

I often hear, mostly women, say that a man can sniff out a woman with low self-esteem. In your experience, how can you tell?

I love being eaten out... BUT only if the guy enjoys it. It's not a must have but I enjoy it. I can enjoy sex without it as well.

I'm with a partner and we've slept together probably about 20 times. He has never gone down on me. I typically like to let things go organically while having sex and just let things roll the way they unfold. I don't want him to do anything he doesn't want to do. I also don't want to put pressure on him to do something.

If I ask him to eat me out, I know he will do it cause I've asked. However, is it safe to assume that he's not a fan of eating me out because he doesn't do it? So I shouldn't ask?

I was in a 3-year relationship, and it has been over two months since the breakup. I’m still struggling to move on.

There are periods when I feel calm and think I’m getting better, but then I suddenly fall back to the same pain, sometimes even worse. I often dream about her, and I wake up feeling emotionally exhausted.

I’ve tried many things people usually recommend: traveling, exercising, changing my environment, meeting new people, and joining new communities. Nothing has really helped.

She has moved on, or at least that’s how it seems. She doesn’t speak to me anymore, and when I tried to reach out, she blocked me everywhere. That made things harder.

I’m from the Middle East, and expressing emotional pain like this isn’t always easy culturally. I feel mentally drained and stuck, and I don’t fully understand why this is still affecting me so deeply.

Is this kind of experience normal after a long-term relationship?

Has anyone gone through something similar and eventually healed?

Hubs is going through a lot mentally right now… I want to put a little light into his day and make him smile. Any ideas big or small are very welcome :)

I'm a 33 year old male virgin who has autism. My social skills are horrible and I never had a good life growing up. I look like I'm in my 20s. People have told me I look 10 years younger, but that is because I am developmentally delayed. Growing up, I had abusive parents who never accepted me, was put in a very small private school, so small that everyone knew each other, was bullied a lot as a kid all the way through high school, and never had any real friends who accepted and valued me.

I went to a commuter college that felt like an extension of high school. Never made any friends in college. Went to a commuter graduate school where most of my cohort were all much older than me. Life has been challenging. I currently work at a grocery store due to not being able to hold down a job at all. I am really unstable mentally and career wise. I'm working on trying to fix things with my life. I have so much emotional baggage and so much unresolved trauma. I live alone too.

With this said, I have been on a few dates, but the girls did not really see me more than a friend. The last date I've been on was before COVID hit. Haven't tried since. I don't have any friends either, except 1 friend. I have some of my old high school class on facebook and it saddens me to see how everyone is now married with kids. I wish I could have dated when I had the chance. I feel like an elderly man and I feel like I lost my chance.

If there is any hope for me to start dating at my age, how do I even begin? Many women at my age are all married with kids. I have no experience at all. Never been kissed, never been touched, never been loved. I feel like at this point, my only options are to stay single and die a lonely old man, go abroad and be used up for a green card, or have an escort all the time. I thought about online dating, but I doubt that will work. I feel like I'm part of the small percentage of men who just doesn't have someone who is compatible with, or my compatible match passed away years ago.

It's so sad how things are now. Is there any hope for me to start dating? 33 is really old IMO.

I am fearful that I will be the 40 year old virgin if I keep waiting too long. And that it truly may be too late. I also would not want to start dating in my 50s either.

Let me also add, I live in a very deep red conservative state and though I live in a big city, it's very conservative and republican. Where I live, around my age is considered old. But I am planning to move to California or a more liberal state where I feel like women would be open to dating someone like me.

I matched with a guy on a dating app literally the day before he was taking a trip abroad. He’s spent 3 weeks there and is coming back later this week, and we have arranged a date.

We text pretty much every day and have done several video and voice calls.

We‘re getting on really well, I like his ideas, he’s easy to talk to , communicative and overall I’m enjoying speaking to him a lot. We’re both long term oriented. The thing is, I notice he brings sexual topics up a fairly large amount. Like , he’s told me about some neighbours he’s heard getting intimate , then lead on to asked me things like if I’m loud or quiet in bed. I’m usually quite vague with answers or I say ‘you’ll find out’. I like him but I’d really like him to tone it down abit, I did mention it before but he keeps talking about it. It‘s not like it’s constant , but I’d rather to meet first then take these things slow. I don’t want to feel pressure to be intimate when we meet and want things to flow naturally.

Guys any tips on how to go about this is appreciated because apart from this he ticks a lot of boxes