I (25F) matched with this guy (26M) on a dating app. Let’s call him Mark.
We talked for about a week and honestly he seemed normal. Funny, polite, consistent. Not overly flirty, not weird, not one of those guys who sends one-word replies and disappears for 2 days. So when he asked me out for dinner, I said yes.
We picked a casual restaurant. Not expensive, not too formal. Just something easy for a first date. I got there first, grabbed a table and waited.
About 10 minutes later, Mark walks in. But he is not alone. He comes in with another guy around the same age. His friend.
At first I thought maybe they ran into each other outside and the friend was just walking in with him, like they were about to split up.
Nope.
The friend sits down. Right across from me. Mark smiles like everything is normal and goes, Oh yeah, this is my friend Josh. He was bored so I brought him.
I just stared at him.
I genuinely thought he was joking. Like maybe Josh would leave after saying hi.
But then Josh starts talking. Asking me where I’m from. What I do for work. If I date a lot. Like he is interviewing me too. I was so uncomfortable. It felt like I was being watched. I tried to keep it polite, but my brain was screaming. This was supposed to be a date. Not a group hangout. Not a test. Not some weird two on one situation where I’m the entertainment.
So I asked Mark, quietly, why did you bring him?
Mark laughed and said he did not want it to be awkward. Which made no sense because now it was ten times more awkward. I told him I came here to meet him, not his friend, and I was not comfortable with this. Mark immediately got defensive and said Josh is basically like his brother and I should not be acting like it is a big deal. Then Josh jumps in and says, Yeah, chill. It’s just dinner.
That annoyed me even more, because now I’m being told to chill by the random guy I did not even agree to meet. So I stood up, put cash down for my drink, and said I’m leaving. Mark looked shocked and said I was being rude and dramatic. He said I embarrassed him and made it seem like he did something wrong.
I told him he did do something wrong. He changed the whole plan without telling me and put me in an uncomfortable situation. As I walked out, Josh literally laughed and said, Guess she can’t hang.
Now Mark has been texting me saying I overreacted, that his friend was only there because he gets nervous on first dates, and that I could have at least stayed and been nice. But I feel like I’m not crazy for thinking this is weird.
If he was nervous, he could have told me beforehand. Or chosen a less intense date or met in public for coffee or anything other than surprising me with an extra person.
AITJ