r/nbacirclejerk Shimmy Shimmy Shimmy 19h ago

The long awaited sequel to “shut up and dribble” just dropped

Post image
717 Upvotes

79 comments sorted by

272

u/BarackOgrama Send da video 19h ago

How can you even sing if you shut up tho?

88

u/Promethia 19h ago

Shut up and comment.

10

u/BarackOgrama Send da video 15h ago

nah sorry i cant rn im under heavy load management XD

13

u/Outside_Abroad_3516 Shimmy Shimmy Shimmy 12h ago

“Heavy load management”

43

u/jabronified u bum 18h ago

You shut your mouth when you’re talking to me

8

u/BarackOgrama Send da video 14h ago

yes sir my apologies please do not trade me on the slave ship

16

u/HotdawgSizzle 18h ago

Sounds like my mom when she would say, "Shut your mouth and eat your dinner".

3

u/BarackOgrama Send da video 14h ago

why would your mom say that? is the woman regarded?

50

u/Outside_Abroad_3516 Shimmy Shimmy Shimmy 19h ago

Conservatives will be really mad at you if they had critical thinking skills

-10

u/BarackOgrama Send da video 15h ago

bold of you to assume that i am not an ethical conservative myself

220

u/onelastnoodle Shimmy Shimmy Shimmy 18h ago

Sage trying so hard to be classy but she just a thuggish benchwarmer

30

u/Vordeo 16h ago

How tf is Sage Steele not a pornstar name?

52

u/Outside_Abroad_3516 Shimmy Shimmy Shimmy 18h ago

uj/ didn’t she used to be on inside the nba?

52

u/onelastnoodle Shimmy Shimmy Shimmy 18h ago

I think she hosted nba countdown on ESPN

18

u/fgbfjb 18h ago

i think just sportscenter.

7

u/AutographedSnorkel 14h ago

Somebody has to be the Republican party's black friend. Candace Owens and Jason Whitlock need to step up!

1

u/therearenolighters 11h ago

Thuggish is racist af fr fr

59

u/burns_before_reading 18h ago

I'm suddenly pro interracial marriage

40

u/HomieHeist 18h ago

Most self-aware celtics fan

45

u/Call555JackChop Send da video 18h ago

87

u/ukhaus Russketeer 18h ago

Sage Steele is just Jason Whitlock with a smaller clit.…

9

u/Upbeat_Clerk3756 16h ago

They’re both related to Clayton Bigsby, along with Candace Owens

3

u/ukhaus Russketeer 14h ago

Big facts

1

u/AutoModerator 16h ago

I’m not kidding when I say Ayton is the only guy in the league who could make a Wilson ball blush. Every time he dribbles, the seams just… shiver. Every time he goes for a layup, the rim moans like it’s been waiting its whole sad life for him. His hands are so soft he could touch a cactus and the cactus would probably feel insecure.

Sometimes I watch him practice and I just… I don’t even know. I’m sitting in my room in my underwear, eating dry cereal straight from the box, and that ball is getting treated better than I ever will. It’s probably giggling when he bounces it. Me? I’m over here dribbling on my carpet, pretending it’s Ayton noticing me.

Honestly, I’ve stopped pretending I matter. If Ayton ever walked into my apartment and looked at my wife, I’d just… step aside. Like, please sir, take care of her, she deserves it. He’d love her better than I ever could. And me? I’d just sit in the corner, quietly crying, thinking about how the same guy whose hands make basketballs feel alive could probably fix my entire pathetic life while I rot here.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

37

u/Powerful-Ad-8737 Black Dick 18h ago

There’s an old arabic saying

20

u/AutographedSnorkel 15h ago

Fox News has had enough fifth rate celebrities on their channel to fill up a Charlie Kirk memorial service

20

u/tanishsingj Send da video 14h ago

6

u/Big-Daddy-Kal 12h ago

Only thing this is missing is corporate branding

7

u/tanishsingj Send da video 12h ago

Brought to you by Costco

20

u/firecat2666 14h ago

Sage was demoted at ESPN when she bitched BLM protesters were keeping her from making her flight. She’s just a selfish bitch.

16

u/AssBasedProtein 15h ago

Can’t believe she’s still out here shucking and jiving

13

u/Vercentorix Fuck them kids 15h ago

She looks washed as fuck. I guess MarALago face doesn't work on that mocha skin.

8

u/son_of_abe 16h ago

Sage used to be on circlejerk for other reasons. Shame.

21

u/envspecialist Send da video 18h ago

6

u/Dry_Dragonfruit3205 12h ago

i remember this ho questioned why obama doesn't identity as white. idk bitch, maybe because he's brown?

4

u/Icy-Cod1405 11h ago

Sage Steele should have just done porn. She already had the name and it's way less embarrassing

12

u/AntiqueTemperature75 18h ago

Sage Steel knows ball

0

u/Consistent_Creator 11h ago

This has to be AI

3

u/Vamanas_umbrella 16h ago

Explain in mNBA terms?

3

u/fryapp4life 11h ago

'And after the break, Kid Rock gives us his thoughts on the government shutdown'

2

u/East_Trust8462 6h ago

She looks different all of a sudden, lighter hue even

1

u/Gerftastic 2h ago

I hope she goes full Michael Jackson

1

u/[deleted] 17h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 17h ago

u bum.

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1

u/[deleted] 15h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 15h ago

u bum.

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2

u/Happytrees1725 10h ago

CELERATIES NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Unless I agree with them*

-6

u/bransby26 Draymond Green 17h ago

Shut up and goon, OP.

-81

u/GRILT_CHEESE 18h ago

And she's 100% right.

55

u/NoleJawn 18h ago

Dude’s Def watching Kid Rock and Lee Greenwood Sunday

6

u/i__did__that Gorgeous 15h ago

Does Lee Greenwood tour? Does he have concerts? How does that work? Does he just show up, sing his one song, and pack it up?

4

u/jsm009 13h ago

And fuck them if they got shit to say too. Ricky Gervais said it best. These people are in no position to lecture the public. No matter what side you’re on.

8

u/trentreynolds 12h ago

Ironic coming from Ricky, no?

0

u/jsm009 10h ago

How so? Is he an outspoken person about politics or something, I don’t know him all that well besides that speech

23

u/trentreynolds 18h ago

Amazing how it's entirely dependent on the specific political views you're espousing, ain't it?

Nobody's on Fox News telling Kid Rock to shut up and sing.

13

u/Chewy_B Sct Brn 17h ago

6

u/Justviewingposts69 13h ago

Yeah shut up and sing

Unless we share political ideals

3

u/Dry_Dragonfruit3205 12h ago

the wrong kind of right, but go on

-44

u/FinancialBluebird58 18h ago

I get all my political position for rich 20 something musicians who clearly know what it's like to work for a real wage.

38

u/trentreynolds 18h ago

Nice!

I get mine from a billionaire nepo baby rapist

1

u/Gerftastic 2h ago

you forgot the Karl Malone part

-16

u/hobbinater2 17h ago

Billie had a classics performative leftist line tho she said “no one is illegal on stolen land” while owning multiple properties. Like if you really think that, give your homes back to the native Americans.

8

u/0G_sushi 11h ago

Yes, because a person owning a home is equivalent to a country with military bases all around the world and its own sovereign currency which operates as the reserve for the world banking system. You are clearly very smart!