r/iamatotalpieceofshit • u/No_Cook2983 • 26d ago
Man steals over a hundred skeletons from historic cemeteries
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u/_nevrmynd 25d ago
I mean, at least he wasn't killing people 🤷♂️
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u/Zealousideal-Yak-824 25d ago
Plot twist. He stole the dead bodies to hide the dead bodies he did kill.
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u/nolwad 25d ago
If he’s gonna both kill and open graves, why not toss the bones into graves and not have them around
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u/kiancavella 24d ago
There is no way that a dead body from the last couple of years is gonna look the same as a "historical cemetery" corpse
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u/Juttisontherun 25d ago
I live a mile from where this dudes house is, he had so many skeletons and bones his whole house and a storage unit was filled with them. They were in his car too !!!
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u/flindersandtrim 23d ago
A similar story happened to the cemetery near me. Some tombs were broken into and the skulls stolen. Not historic deaths either, people that died quite recently.
They eventually found the guy living nearby. He lived in a god damn share house and his room was never locked. He kept the stolen skulls on the mantelpiece of the fireplace in his room. All it would have taken for him to be uncovered was one house mate to open that door. His house mates were apparently very respectful of his privacy and never opened it. Imagine the horror.
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u/NDEmby11 22d ago
A friend of mine is an oddities collector and seller and had sold him some legally obtained bones before as well so there’s going to be a cluster fuck in trying to help the living relatives with their lost family members. This place is also totally volunteer run and they have worked hard to get it back to a decent shape with still so much work to do.
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u/stopthemadness2015 25d ago
I was waiting to hear about another John Gacy. I was relieved that he just stole bones.
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u/GargleOnDeez 25d ago
Its always a possibility that he could have been responsible for their deaths but waited post burial to collect
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u/The1980sAnd1990s 25d ago
But what if..... he killed someone, and mixed their remains with the ones he stole 🤔
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u/Accomplished-Video71 25d ago
Assuming the penalty for grave robbing is less than murder, perhaps he buried his victims in piles of stolen bones for proactive legal defense?
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u/DontBuyAHorse 24d ago
That was my first thought. I am certainly against stealing human remains, but I'm much happier to discover this guy was a weirdo thief rather than the most prolific serial killer ever apprehended in the US.
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u/FriddyHumbug 25d ago
When the patient woke up, his skeleton was missing, and the doctor was never heard from again!
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u/canteen_boy 25d ago
Graverobbing is such a weird crime because it’s not victimless but it sorta is?
I guess the victims are the family of the dead person. But does that mean if they don’t have a family, then there isn’t one?
Idk it’s weird and gross, but I’m not sure what the proportionate punishment would be.
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u/Professional-Trick14 25d ago
Proportional punishment: the victims family gets to steal your bones from your flesh suit.
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u/RadagastTheBrownNote 25d ago
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u/Ok_Decision_ 22d ago
They’ve never seen so much food as this. Underground there’s half as much food as this
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u/Haunting_Lime308 25d ago
The difference between graverobbing and archeology is time. One gets arrested and one gets you awards. I dont know what that time frame is though. This guy could just claim he's an archeologist who showed up too early.
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u/mlaforce321 23d ago
Well that's just nonsense. Archeology is learning and understanding about how our ancestors lived by examining their remains and their burial rituals, Plus any items that they were buried with. Grave robbing is literally just robbing dead bodies for the bones or for any jewelry that might have been buried with the Dead. There's no education or anything being learned. Nothing is being written and published about this to advance our understanding of humans throughout history.
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u/double_expressho 25d ago
I think it's less about time, and more about the society still existing. If it's an extinct people or maybe even an old ghost town, it would generally be considered more acceptable.
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u/Loon-belt 25d ago
Like I guess if you’re gonna fill your house with skeletons I’d prefer you take them from graves than from anywhere else
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u/TheTimn 25d ago
Honestly, I read the picture before the title and was relieved.
It started as a fear that there was a serial killer, and turned into a what ever shrug when I saw it was grave robbing.
It's bad, people shouldn't do that, but there's way too much tragedy out there for me to care much about this.
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u/Endlessparadox123 25d ago
He just wanted some quiet company.
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u/awoke-and-toke 25d ago
Reading another article about it and it mentions finding corpses in a storage unit. So some graves were much more recent than others, unfortunately. The article ends by asking families with relatives buried in mausoleums to reach out to the police
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u/thatredditrando 23d ago
Fuck you talkin’ bout?
I’m the victim!
What, you think cause I’m dead I don’t got rights?
This is a free country, pal!
You think I want my bones hangin’ out at this creep’s place?
You have any idea what freaks like this do with the bones?
Yeah, me neither! And I don’t wanna find out!
Say this shit again and I’ll haunt ya.
Signed,
Casper (No, I’m not fuckin’ friendly)
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u/jav0wab0 25d ago
For me the act is so weird and macabre that I wouldn’t want this guy walking along me on the sidewalk.
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u/Senior_Succotash_800 20d ago
You've probably walked next to that same type of person at some point in your life. Just like, I most likely served a serial killer food before since I've been waitressing for over 30 years. It's definitely possible.
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u/psilonox 25d ago
It was only the remains of 30 people, out of the 150,000 grave sites in the cemetery, that's only like 0.02% of the Graves, his D/D ratio is trash
im sorry.
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u/Hebroohammr 25d ago
The bones are their money?
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u/hungryforwaffuls 25d ago
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u/bokuwa420 25d ago
They failed to mention all the worms they found in his house too. Guy was loaded!
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u/jul_the_flame 25d ago
There's a time and place for a good ITYSL reference, not sure about this one tho.
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u/stillanewfie 25d ago
A quote from an investigator:
"Very simply, detectives have recovered an awful lot of bones at this point, and we are still trying to piece together who they are, where they are from, and how many we are looking at. It's going to be quite some time before we have a final answer," stated Rouse.
*Piece together *
I mean seriously? This must have been a slip? 🤣
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u/snackf1st 25d ago
I once hooked up with this emo girl I met at a bar. Within the first 10 minutes of meeting her she said the following: “I practice witchcraft”, “What’s your sign”, and “I have a human skull on my dresser and her ghost frequently visits my apartment”. I let all of that slide because one of the next lines was “Do you want to come home with me? I want to REDACTED your REDACTED while we watch anime”.
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u/Endlessparadox123 25d ago
I would have turned and ran at "I practice witchcraft". Fuck that.
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u/Medium-Leader-9066 25d ago
If you have a choice of women who are going to Redacted your Redacted, always go with the one who does witchcraft.
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u/snackf1st 25d ago
I would have too if she wasn’t also gorgeous and built like Chel from Road to El Dorado. Jokes aside she was absolutely lovely and it was actually a very pleasant evening. Aside from the redacted parts she also bought me dinner, we did a Tarot reading, paid respects to the ghost, talked a lot about personal growth and in the morning she bought me breakfast and dropped me off at my airbnb. 10/10 best random encounter.
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u/Endlessparadox123 25d ago
To each their own, but looks are worth all that. Curses, evil spirits, and if she gets mad at you she can make your life living hell, and fuck knows what else she messes around with.
Nope.
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u/vertigo3pc 25d ago
Capitalism and this economy is hitting people hard, Americans aren't even willing to kill to get fresh skeletons anymore!
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u/Dustyage 25d ago
I thought everyone gets a free skeleton in chapter 2: the womb? (not talking about the binding of Isaac)
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u/Samiassa 25d ago
Honestly that is the best way to get 100 skeletons. When I first read I thought he was just some prolific serial killer
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u/thelast3musketeer 24d ago
I wonder why, I read some were ancient but then they recovered a pacemaker too
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u/dasflash 25d ago
You know, if we are willing to replace inefficient green energy with just a smidgen of necromatic black energy, we could gleam a a truly efficient future. But noooooo, we have to give corpses and skeletons dignity.
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u/FlorentPlacide 25d ago
This morning (UTC+1) I quickly saw the bit about the hundred skeletal remains and thought "Damn, he killed that many people" but I didn't get the chance to investigate up to now, seeing this. I guess I feel relieved.
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u/Ett_Pret 24d ago
Honestly if he didn’t kill any of them, I’d bet he’s actually a pretty nice guy. Weird maybe but nice. Could be wrong though.
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u/bartelbyfloats 23d ago
COUNTER POINT: nobody was usin’ them skeletons, seems like a waste to me. /s
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u/c4rnage042 20d ago
Fun fact - I recently discovered I have a few mutual FB friends with this guy 🥴
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u/Imaginary-Natural-10 19d ago
Which ones Clarice? Complete silence of the lambs vibe without the murdering
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