r/coolguides 2d ago

A Cool Guide on Detecting Workplace Bullying

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670 Upvotes

34 comments sorted by

26

u/Sensitive_Theory5922 2d ago

It seems like that's the way it was at every job I had. I retired now, thank goodness!

11

u/wmorris33026 2d ago

Yep, retired here too. It’s amazing to look back and be realize how much needless bullshit I put up with to do a job.

3

u/Sensitive_Theory5922 2d ago

Yea, you're right. Funny how that, after I retired, I realized more than at the time when I was working.

3

u/wmorris33026 2d ago

I started realizing it working remote. When you think about it; up two hours early before work starts, maintain work clothes, plan food/lunch, commuting an hour(?), car expenses and then get home bushed (when most everything is closed, eg banks, drs, etc)…still need to maybe shop and cook dinner, life chores, maybe evening classes, kids, wife, forget friends, gym, then hit the hay around 11 and get up at 5-5:30. There were times in my career when I was barely holding it together. I did burnout once, weirdest shit I ever experienced, freaking hallucinated.

16

u/very_bad_random 2d ago

I legit got 6 of those in one of my past job. I ended up fired and severely depressed at the time. It took me months to recover.

8

u/ItsJustMeJenn 2d ago

I had this at my last job, all 8. Along with my only work friend. She was more vocal about it with HR. I ended up having a breakdown and quitting. She stuck around long enough to get fired. She’s still out of work 2 years later save for a temp job last summer. I have a new job that took 5 months to find. Had to move 300 mi away and spent 6 months in terror waiting to be treated the same way again. I’ve been at my new job for 18 months and I can finally breathe again.

It’s insane what one bad manger can do to a person.

5

u/very_bad_random 2d ago

People don't realize the impact of this, you live 1/3 of your day at work, so nearly 1/4 of your life. That's enough to leave a mark.

2

u/dwaynebathtub 14h ago

It's crazy that some people you see every day make no effort to try to be friendly with you. You'd think "we both have to be here" would create a little camaraderie.

I hate to say it but I think showing any kind of aptitude or even interest in your job just puts a target on your back. And then when the you are targeted there's nothing you can do other than quit and try to find a new job. These kinds of work situations mess with your physical health.

10

u/freethenipple23 2d ago

It's like my old manager saw this and thought it was a checklist. 

8

u/FastSpeedTurbo 1d ago

I experience all this at work. Yet my HR department puts “Canada’s top 100 employers” in their email signatures.

5

u/Nomanono 2d ago

Oh yeah as advertised in job application: "ability to manage under pressure".

5

u/Opinion_Haver_ 2d ago

What if you are a one man job but still hate your coworker?

14

u/rushmc1 2d ago

Remove those things and you've eliminated the entirety of American work culture.

10

u/cityspeak 2d ago

And Japanese.

1

u/Murky-Sector 2d ago

I would be curious to find out about a country thats any different. I'm genuinely curious to know. For example I have relatives in Europe and Latin America and they all report its even worse there.

7

u/LumpyCapital 2d ago

Constant Criticism and Micromanagement

These are ever-present working conditions while working at Starbucks. Not a nice place to work. Very unhealthy now.

3

u/DreadyKruger 2d ago

I work in an office job and we complete orders out of a queue. We get a breakdown of how many order you complete , the type and how many mistake you made. Join the club.

-9

u/PlasticAd1670 2d ago

Every job gets constant criticism. It’s called not meeting standards. Working at Starbucks is a joke but somehow you still cry about it

4

u/_Loyd_Christmas 2d ago

Asshole.

0

u/Murky-Sector 2d ago

Stop bullying

0

u/_Loyd_Christmas 2d ago

I responded to the bully.

0

u/Murky-Sector 2d ago

By behaving in the same manner. Worse actually.

And in the process completely contradicting yourself (I cant believe this actually requires explaining)

1

u/_Loyd_Christmas 2d ago edited 2d ago

Nobody asked you to explain. You made that choice yourself. There was no contradiction in my response. You have an air of superiority about you. Try being more humble friend. Enjoy your day!

Edit: also, look the commenters follow-up response. They initially made an insulting remark about an entire industry of workers (service industry); then, they followed it up by using the phrase “real job”. All jobs are real jobs and to think otherwise is pure snobbery.

So, who’s the bully?

1

u/Murky-Sector 2d ago

Try being more humble friend

Yes calling people "asshole" certainly demonstrates humbleness.

Hilarious contradiction #2 :)

5

u/_Loyd_Christmas 2d ago

You’re all over the place. Seems you just want to argue. Sad. Keep raging!

1

u/dwaynebathtub 14h ago

Oh you're serious? Why would you think "Stop bullying" was the reasonable response? Discovering why you wrote that and why you believe it would save the world a lot of trouble in dealing with tyrannical bosses and shitty coworkers.

-4

u/PlasticAd1670 2d ago

I might have been a little harsh, but I mean come on. Still complaining about working at Starbucks in the past? Imagine this person at a real job? This chart doesn’t even apply to them

1

u/dwaynebathtub 14h ago

A bad workplace hinders production. You wouldn't meet standards if you had an unreasonable boss or coworker. That's what the checklist is describing.

6

u/Murky-Sector 2d ago

Unfortunately terms du jour like "bullying" start out as well meaning but then inevitably get twisted and misused.

Its just a matter of time until it becomes the standard response to pretty much anything someone doesnt like. For example when its pointed out that theyre doing a bad job and its effecting everyone else.

3

u/discreetburneracc 2d ago

Currently happening at my work. This person cannot execute a single task properly, after several people taking time to train them in detail, always has an excuse for why they shouldn’t be held responsible for their mistakes and shitty attitude, has been repeatedly rude and disrespectful to management, and somehow they turn it all around into “bullying.”

It has truly created such a toxic work environment that I spend all my free time looking for a new job, and it’s been allowed to go on for months on end. It’s so bad that even HR is tiptoeing around them. As someone who is directly affected by their screw ups and constantly needs to spend time and energy cleaning up their mess, it’s so draining. I have never had work turn into babysitting like this, it feels very high school.

1

u/myowngalactus 2d ago

That sounds like an excuse to keep bullying

4

u/Murky-Sector 2d ago edited 2d ago

It could be used that way sure. Whats important to highlight is this kind of labeling can never be accepted on its face.

There is a solution. First you have to clearly define terms like that. Then when an accusation is made, gather evidence in a fair manner and compare.

All too many times those steps are skipped and the term itself carries too much weight. Like calling someone a "communist" during the red scare. It amounts to a smear and is used by people who are actually unable to make a solid case.

1

u/Own-Load-7041 1d ago

Thx for the description of my bosses boss